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@Athelois Hewwo hewwo. I shifted her points around to fit a bit better. And also removed her relationships but that's not important--
Re-review for the point shifting pls <3
@Athelois Dread corrupted and turned into a Vampire! Proficiency points shifted, personality and abilities updated, visual information, life story, etc, pretty much every section got an update and all of the Isldar stuff was shoved into a spoiler!
@LumosJared Sil was turned back into a Kathar and cured of Vampirism! I also shifted her proficiency points to make a bit more sense for what the character's learned ICly. Alas, I couldn't add all that I hoped I could but I tried!
P.S: I know I probably shouldn't have updated this due to incoming proficiency re-write but I figured I'd get it out of the way. I'll change what needs to be changed when it happens, and you can also wait till the re-write to re-review if that's easier for you!
@LumosJared I'm actually going to ask for this sheet to be rejected as I'm going to shelve every character but two due to it being hard to maintain. I may bring her back at a later date, however!
The languages permitted for free are common, homeland dialect, and/or parent's culture dialect. She would have learned Sulveyley Elven, not Plains Elven. Regalia usually tends to use common, so homeland language is pretty moot.
How did Isldar deliver a child to Regalia from Ellador? Why would they deliver a child to Regalia from Ellador? It seems like a lot of work to pawn your child off to someone else, and even more to do it on a different continent. Why would they even leave Ellador for that? It would seem easier to give their child to a different Isldar that would adopt her in Ellador, since they don't like to leave their homeland. So why Regalia? How? What made this such a special case?
Who actually adopted her before she got lost? Were they Yanar? It's a bit vague, and those early years are important.
This is the main issue I take with the languages. It says she spent most of her life with Yanar, but spending most of your life with Yanar doesn't mean you were raised with the language. It would have to be learned if not raised with it.
Mark your edits in BLUEand tag me with @AlphaInsomnia when you're ready.
@AlphaInsomnia Before editing anything, I'd like to point out that she was, in fact, raised by her biological parents for the first eight years of her life. When sending her off to Regalia from Ellador, they traveled with her. However, I will add a reason in a moment here. For the language part. To me, at least, It'd make sense that while yes her biological parents would likely teach her Sulvaley, her spending more of her life with a family that almost fully speaks Plains Elven, I don't see why she wouldn't speak it, and why she would retain much of the Sulvaley without someone speaking to her in it for the majority of her life.
@AlphaInsomnia Requesting a re-review! The app has been entirely revised to better fit the niche/personality/general theme I was originally going for with the character. Updates marked in color and also summarized below:
Basic information tidied up a bit.
Skill information entirely revised, physical stat updated, language added.
Personality and Abilities updated in lieu of her no longer being a Werebeast.
Events added to the life story as well as some minor bits deleted to better fit the new things added. (Also some grammar fixes.)
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