Preserved Sheet Merina Rosencratz

This sheet was missing a prefix or has not been edited for a long period of time. Please create a ticket including a linkif your sheet was moved in error.
AtticCat

AtticCat

haeksen van regalia
Premium
Joined
Jun 22, 2016
Messages
2,336
Reaction score
14,344
Points
413
Age
121
Location
Jamestown
Faction
Insani
Roleplay Guilds
Gloomfolk
outdated​
 

Attachments

  • upload_2017-11-12_20-35-36.png
    upload_2017-11-12_20-35-36.png
    95.5 KB · Views: 514
  • cool-decorative-dividers-free-decorative-text-dividers-decorative-line.jpg
    cool-decorative-dividers-free-decorative-text-dividers-decorative-line.jpg
    35.5 KB · Views: 508
  • CoffeeGif.gif
    CoffeeGif.gif
    834.9 KB · Views: 375
Last edited:
Tiny bump~
 
AtticCat said:
She believes in sacrifice, blood rituals, and a surprisingly twisted form of defending herself
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Vulren leans against the bar leaning toward her, flashing a hollow but charming smile "Hey~"

Here is my review!
  • Main Ambition is a bit too generic, what you have right now is more of a means to an end rather than the end itself. To drive this character forward a main ambition with a little more depth. Based on your life story things like making her parents proud of proving them wrong or something may be candidates.
  • Loyal is more of a personality trait than a strength. I'd move this to personality and replace it with another strength.
Make these edits and then tag me @TheOverseer__
 
TheOverseer__ said:
Vulren leans against the bar leaning toward her, flashing a hollow but charming smile "Hey~"

Here is my review!
  • Main Ambition is a bit too generic, what you have right now is more of a means to an end rather than the end itself. To drive this character forward a main ambition with a little more depth. Based on your life story things like making her parents proud of proving them wrong or something may be candidates.
  • Loyal is more of a personality trait than a strength. I'd move this to personality and replace it with another strength.
Make these edits and then tag me @TheOverseer__
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
I will make them later today, thank you!
 
Alright! I have completed my edits, all made in blue. Tell me if I need to change anything else!~
@TheOverseer__
 
The new strength looks fine. I still feel like the Main Ambition is lacking, however. The basic question is I have is why does she want to learn Water Magic? That is probably really her Main Ambition. Think of it like this- if somebody has a goal to go to college for cooking, they aren't going to college because their goal is to go to college, they are going to college so they can excel at cooking and open a restaurant or something. The restaurant is the main ambition and knowledge in French Cuisine is the vehicle by which they are trying to accomplish this.
 
TheOverseer__ said:
The new strength looks fine. I still feel like the Main Ambition is lacking, however. The basic question is I have is why does she want to learn Water Magic? That is probably really her Main Ambition. Think of it like this- if somebody has a goal to go to college for cooking, they aren't going to college because their goal is to go to college, they are going to college so they can excel at cooking and open a restaurant or something. The restaurant is the main ambition and knowledge in French Cuisine is the vehicle by which they are trying to accomplish this.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Ooh okay, thank you. I will update it when I get the chance!
 
All right, I edited (or more of added to) her main ambition! Tell me if it's still a little bland~ @TheOverseer__
 
AtticCat said:
"How can I trust you?"
View attachment 111042
Basic Information​

Full Name: Merina Isla Taliesin


Nickname(s): Meer


Age: 19


Gender: Female


Race: Claith Ailor


Main Ambition: To expand on her knowledge of Water Magic and Ice Magic and eventually become a expert in Water Magic. She plans to help people see the beauty of the dying art as well as continue her family's traditions as she still believes in them despite her change of scenery in Regalia.

View attachment 111043
Skill Information​

School: Water Magic


Level: Caster Level


Source: Taught by her Grandmother and Mother, starting at the age of fifteen.


School: Ice Magic


Level: Student Level

Source: Taught by her Grandmother and Mother, starting at the age of seventeen.


View attachment 111044
Visual Information​

Eye Color: Emerald Green


Hair Color: Ginger


Hair Style: Normally tied up in a bun, long strands of loose hair hanging over her shoulders and long bangs.


Skin Color: Fair skinned


Clothing: Green and White dress.


Height: 5'8 ft


Weight: 128 lbs

Body Build:
Lean Column

Weapon of Choice:
Fists or magic, though fleeing is usually her first instinct.
​
View attachment 111046Personality and Abilities​

Personality Traits​

(+)Forgiving: Merina is a very forgiving person, often times not holding a grudge against someone very long. While there are some downsides to this, example is her forgiving someone she really shouldn't, most of the time it falls under her few 'good' traits. This is good because she doesn't tend to stay mad very long, if she were to it might drive people even further away and she'd be even more alone. At the current time, she has very few friends but due to the fact of her forgiving nature she has kept the ones she has despite some rather cruel things they're said or done to her, in her opinion.


(+)Sweet: While rare to see, Merina is an extremely nice and innocent person, except for her lack of manners and sometimes questionable beliefs. Her demeanor is usually quite shy, but she is very nice and usually an interesting character to talk to and be around. While she does have a few odd 'habits', she tends to be more of a skittish puppy, than a vicious Ailor. Many people often times will try to talk to her only to have her run off, but if they manage to actually get her to listen they would realize that she's fairly harmless.


(=)Curious: Curiousity killed the cat, they say and that just might be how Merina goes. While curiosity might be a nice trait for a person to have, it can also have it's downsides. Such as the time when she asked what in the world was Unionism. There are times it's good though, when she needs to learn something important that no one knew she didn't know, she'd simply just question it and get a nice explanation that might help her later on.


(=) Superstitious: As she grew up in a tribe of barbaric Claith, she learned to be rather superstitious. While most of her beliefs are harmless there are a few that carry a bit of weight, mostly due to their rather dark cost. For example, Merina was taught as a child that bleeding out weak children, such as herself, that they would be 'reborn' stronger. It was also believed by her family, and tribe, that washing your hair or dying it with the blood would make you yourself stronger.


(-)Timid: Merina's most common to spot trait, shyness. The Claith is extremely timid, mostly due to moving somewhere so different from her tribe such as Regalia. While it's not extremely hard to gain her trust, it's super easy to scare her away. Sneaking up on her, or even reaching to shake her hand, can send her squirreling away to hid, this is the main reason she has such a lack of friends.

(-)Barbaric: Merina's worst trait, one she shares with nearly every other Claith from her home. From her manners, which are nonexistent, to her beliefs, this girl is the epitome of a barbarian despite lacking the looks. She believes in sacrifice, blood rituals, and a surprisingly twisted form of defending herself, which includes trying to jab out the eyes of her attackers. While it's not common that she'll just start attacking someone or growling like a dog, it's not promised that she won't do such things if you were to attack or insult her.


Ambidextrous: While she isn't the fastest writer, Merina can do it quite well with either hand. This 'strength' is mainly good if she were to get her hands on a weapon she would be able to use it quite well with either hand. As well as this, if she were to injury one hand, she would've have injured her 'main' (dominate) hand, considering both are equal. She has always had this talent, though it should be mentioned that usually she uses her right hand and only takes advantage of this strength in the situations that it's needed, usually sticking to simply using her right hand.


Agile: While she may not be strong, she's certainly quick. Merina is a very flighty person, making for one that certainly can run far and fast, as well as jump along on to rooftops to safety. While there are a few downsides to this being her only real 'combat' skill. Such as she's fairly helpless if she would to injury one of her legs.

Stealthy: As well as being quick, the girl is fairly good at sticking to the shadows. While this is mostly a trait formed after moving to Regalia, one that she's used mostly to hide from strangers. This skill could come in handy though if she were to be hired as an informant or something close to one, as in a spy.

View attachment 111049
Weaknesses​
Anti-Social: Merina is especially anti-social, though not monotone like many. She mostly just fears being hated or hurt by the 'strange' people of Regalia. She is, however difficult to achieve, very interesting to talk to if you manage to lure her out of her figurative shell.


Physically Weak: As mentioned, she is very weak. The girl's wrist could probably break if given a strong enough handshake honestly, her weak physique is one reason the Claith come to Regalia. Her parents, as mentioned in a previously, believed that bleeding out weak children could have them reborn stronger and she is fairly weak, meaning that in, a shorter sense, they planned on killed her in the belief that she'd be reborn 'stronger' .


Unintelligent: Having never been given the chance to learn, Merina is rather...stupid. This is one main reason that she's so curious. While she does know how to read and write (on a young child's level), she doesn't know even the basics of mathematics or science.

View attachment 111050Relationships​
Agnes Taliesin- Merina's mother and someone she dislikes more than anything. Agnes was planning to have Merina killed with help of her father. (NPC)

Andrew Taliesin- Merina's father and someone she also dislikes more than anything, except her mother. Andrew was helping her mother, Agnes, plan on having her death. (NPC)


Elspeth Taliesin- Merina's grandmother, and her favorite grandparent. She was one of the few that didn't hate her despite the girl being a 'disappointment' to every other Taliesin. (NPC)


Emilia Taliesin- Merina's dear sister, the only one she felt she could really talk to. (NPC)


Bran Durham- The first and only Claith she's met so far in Regalia, Merina felt trusting of him as he was different from the other Regalians, in her opinion. While they've spoken rarely, she still considers him one of her only friends. (@Jouster)


Dante Draekylus- Someone she has very little trust for but owes her life to after he saved her from nearly drowning in the park's lake. (@MrSpideyPool)


View attachment 111051
Life Story

On the island of Eriu-Innis, there was the large and solitary family of Taliesin. While they traded with most others of nearby hamlets, they tended to go about their own traditions, most of which didn't follow the ideas of most other Claiths. One, for example, being that it was believed by the family Taliesin that knowing water magic was a sign of good luck, as well as helped catch more fish. Second, was the belief that weak children should be bled to death and have their blood used to wash their mother's hair, the bodies left out for the fairies. Merina Taliesin was born in her mother's stone house on a misty, cold day. Her father glanced up towards his brother, neither sure who's child it was but not like it mattered with house close their families lived together. Merina was a rather small child from the start, her mother frowning at the tiny body but having hope that she would grow big and strong like her sister as she got older.


Merina didn't get bigger or stronger, actually staying rather frail and small compared to her older sister. Despite this her mother always hoped, still she had more children and several were slay as they barely made it through birth. Merina enjoyed exploring her little secluded home, often times straying far away from the odd family that was hers. By the time she was fifteen her mother and grandmother believed it time to teach her the talent of water magic, while seemingly useless to others, as per tradition her family believed it brought good fortune. The girl took to it rather quickly, having nothing else to do but watch the river. While days turned to years, the girl began to finally begin to move water and by the time she reached seventeen her grandmother thought it was best she learned something else to go with it, seeming as water magic couldn't really protect her and she wasn't exactly built to carry a longsword. Her mother and grandmother, on top of water magic, began to teach her the art of Ice magic. It wasn't until she turned eighteen that Merina heard her mother and father arguing. They weren't really arguing, honestly, more angrily agreeing. They thought Merina was a disappointment, being such a frail daughter. She probably would never survive childbirth or illness if it ever struck and they couldn't afford to care for her if she was to simply die anyway. The two decided what was best was to leave her for the fae.


That night, Merina pulled on her green smock and black cloak, nothing else in hand except for a small riverstone that her sister had given her nearly a nine months ago for her birthday. It was suppose to be good luck. She shoved the pebble into her pocket and took off into the night, running as fast as her little feet could take her.


Eventually, she arrived at a small, rare port. A trade ship was docked, loaded and ready to sail away by the next morning, the girl would've been too late if she left a day later or treaded slowly. Three days of travel was wearying. She looked about and slunk aboard, slipping through crates and sitting in a hiding spot among the traded goods. She must have fallen asleep, for when she opened her eyes they were sailing. What seemed like months, and maybe was, later, Merina found herself in Regalia. She'd snuck out of the crates and to the dock before anyone found her, rushing off to the city. And now, looking upon it's shining, brightness, Merina couldn't help but feel as if she'd made a dreadful, dreadful decision. ​
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
This is by far the best character you've ever made
 
Going to be rewriting soon - well updating the format and such.
 
Seeing as Overseer is currently on leave, I'll be reviewing this character sheet. Expect a response soon.
 
Staff Review-

  • Visual Information
    • Less so of a required change but a notification: the levels of magic Merina boasts are fairly impotent in any combat situation. It seems like you have this base covered, though- just ensure you adhere to it should CRP ever arise.
  • Talents
    • Elaborate more on how Merina acquired her skill in agility- I'd also suggest breaking this down into two sections, seeing as agility and stealth are two different skillsets. Regardless, either prune one of the traits or split this into two separate traits and go about explaining how she honed these skills properly.
  • Weaknesses
    • Anti-social tends to be a copout weakness. Merge this with your personality section or add it under additional personality information if you wish to keep it.
  • Life Story
    • Expand further on Merina's studying of magic. Why did her grandmother decide to teach her it if the general family consensus was to dispose of her? Furthermore, how did her grandmother react to her parents wanting to sacrifice her to the Fae? This seems like a conflict of interest and something that would be a crucial part of her story, yet there's not much detailing such an internal conflict.
    • Flesh out at what point of her life she started training in the aforementioned agility and stealth skills. Keep in mind that a frail individual generally needs some muscle to pull off the footwork required for agility.
Mark all additions / changes in blue and tag me once you're done.​
 
Fatherland said:
Staff Review-

  • Visual Information
    • Less so of a required change but a notification: the levels of magic Merina boasts are fairly impotent in any combat situation. It seems like you have this base covered, though- just ensure you adhere to it should CRP ever arise.
  • Talents
    • Elaborate more on how Merina acquired her skill in agility- I'd also suggest breaking this down into two sections, seeing as agility and stealth are two different skillsets. Regardless, either prune one of the traits or split this into two separate traits and go about explaining how she honed these skills properly.
  • Weaknesses
    • Anti-social tends to be a copout weakness. Merge this with your personality section or add it under additional personality information if you wish to keep it.
  • Life Story
    • Expand further on Merina's studying of magic. Why did her grandmother decide to teach her it if the general family consensus was to dispose of her? Furthermore, how did her grandmother react to her parents wanting to sacrifice her to the Fae? This seems like a conflict of interest and something that would be a crucial part of her story, yet there's not much detailing such an internal conflict.
    • Flesh out at what point of her life she started training in the aforementioned agility and stealth skills. Keep in mind that a frail individual generally needs some muscle to pull off the footwork required for agility.
Mark all additions / changes in blue and tag me once you're done.​
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Took Anti-social out of Weaknesses and Agile out of strengths, as well as added onto Stealthy. Change the 'mother and grandmother teaching her magic' to just her grandmother as well as added in a reason that I can be more descriptive with if you want.~
 
Removed all mentions of magic and edited some smaller things highlighted in blue. @Fatherland
 
Added pictures, just need the tag added back, please! @Fatherland
 
Tag restored.
 
Edited the first paragraph for appearance towards strangers and added onto her life story and relationships. All edits made in blue! @Fatherland
 
Added some aesthetics, could the 'Approved' tag be reset, please? Thanks in advance.~
@HydraLana
 
Approved tag restored.
 
I added a line to paragraph two concerning that she's been recently educated/is still being taught.
I added the weakness Gauche to replace Uneducated as I realize that was something that I've always played her to have. (She's clumsy).
@Fatherland @HydraLana
 
Omit the roll system you've added for Gauche from that specific subsection on your character application. It's fine to put it somewhere under additional information, but for the sake of formatting it should be absent from the weakness bullet points.
 
Fatherland said:
Omit the roll system you've added for Gauche from that specific subsection on your character application. It's fine to put it somewhere under additional information, but for the sake of formatting it should be absent from the weakness bullet points.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Done!
 
Are you seeking a re-review?
 
Approved tag restored.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom