Preserved Sheet Bomani Chaths

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Susow

Susow

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«❅» Full Name | Bomani Chaths
«❅» Race | Asha Rakhet, Mew-Clade {Lion Head}
«❅» Age | 43
«❅» Gender | Male
«❅» Sexuality | Heterosexual
«❅» Eye Color | Orange
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«❅» Belief | Bomani believes in making the world a better place in his own image, with those who strive for greatness and bettering themselves while ridding corruption or voidal figures from the world. He worships his own parent the Arken of Change at times.

«❅» Char Concept | Bomani is a Silven Warrior intent on always improving some aspect of his fighting quality. He always seeks to change himself and turn into something greater than he already is, challenging the greatest of foes and attempting to give them guidance for changing themselves as well.

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REWORKING

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Total Points | « 14 Prof Points

«❅» « 7 Strength
«❅» « 6 Constitution
«❅» « 0 Wisdom
«❅» « 1 Dexterity
«❅» « 0 Magic
«❅» « 0 Charisma


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«❅» Strength Point Buy
⤜ Fisticuffs Pack
⤜ Warrior Pack
⤜ Duelist Pack
⤜ Frenzy Pack
⤜ Demolisher Pack
⤜ Heavy Pack
⤜ Hunter Pack

«❅» Constitutional Point Buy
(Training Point Buy)
⤜ Resilience Pack
⤜ Physique Pack
⤜ Bruteforce Pack
⤜ Counterplay Pack
⤜ Bonfire Pack
⤜ Heavyweight Pack

«❅» Dexterity Point Buy
⤜ Balance Pack


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« Ibeth | (Racial Language) »
« Common | (Taught by Parents) »

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«❅» Appearance | Bomani stands at the height of 6'6 with a muscular build. He contains a Lion-like head with fur travelling down his upper body and skin among his lower. His eyes are that of a silver with a blue tint inside representing his silvenism.


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Life Story

«❅» Birth - Childhood | Bomani was born in a rather harsh environment along the ashal islands. Born into a gladiator pit towards two slaved parents where he soon were forced upon the labor they took on. Bomani had not realized his father however were the Arken of Change and proposed he would bring change to his fate and the state of the arena he were brought into.

«❅» Childhood - Adolescence | Bomani founded most of his skills and strengths from within such arena, wordly branded as the the Battle Beast for the ferocious display he put on at such a young age. Though with it came the deeper price for bargaining his skill as many knew he were the spawn of a demon couple. Purposely given harsher challenges and threats to faced, he were used as a mere piece of war by the elders in control of the arena.

«❅» Adolescence - Adulthood | Bomani faced many hardships growing up in such an arena as not all battles could be won. He had no choice but to keep fighting until after finally settling the debt his parents once had, he were released and free to explore the world around himself after clearing out the arena and clearing all demands of him given by the masters of the arena. He left his quarters burned after lighting it ablaze with his ash and sparks created by his claws, giving those of the arena much wealth to use in order to fix the damage.

«❅» Adulthood - The Regalian Times | Bomani had nothing to go off of as all he knew were bloodsport, having a hard time communicating with those around him, by some odd chance Regalia came up in a conversation and he sought to simply explore there, seeking to expand what freedom he now had.
 
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@Antimreoir Completely reworked Imrilith. Changed every single thing to another race with other categories and etc. App is up for re-review.
 
@Antimreoir Bomani has been infected with Archbloodism. App is up for re-review. Ill add in recent life soon.
 
@Koyote

After some reassessment I'm taking this under re-review, Archblood's eyes are purple at base, and you would require an Altalar to change the form of Archblood from Primal to Exist.

Also, I would like you to clarify how his Archbloodism came about, as such seems like an incredibly recent change considering how new the application is.

Furthermore, please elaborate on how Bomani learned Faraddi, as neither of their parents are Qadir, they cannot have it as a racial language, please change this or invest in linguistics.
 
@Antimreoir Made the requested changes. Removed Faraddi, Archbloodism is set to Primal and changed the eye color to Purple. Bomani after being taken to a deserted island with Therris rped by Caelmus. Had taken a ship and sailed outside of Regalia to a Dragon Temple where a ritual were performed on him for Archbloodism.
 
@Koyote Could you tell me the character's motivation for engaging in such a ritual? Thanks for making the other edits.
 
@Antimreoir Bomani is a character who was solely motivated by fighting as it were all he were interested in. Upon being put in a situation where he were alone with Therris having to survive, they approached what looked to be statues of snakes which have in fact represented Sea Serpents. Of course both him and Therris left before anything major could happen though the fear he saw in Therris started leaving himself feared for the unknown. As he walked into the Dragon Temple some time after sailing, the fear of the unknown and powerful beings never ceased from his memory. The thought of being infinitely more weaker than the creatures he has not even seen yet left him with a drive to change himself, in which he accepted the ritual.
 
Reapproved.

Though as a small side-suggestion that isn't as important, investing in a few more diverse proficiencies will really flesh out the character.
 
@Antimreoir Was working with the character and changed a few things up. Removed points from Fist Combat, added in shielding combat and spent the rest of the points on Arcanology. App is up for re-review.
 
@Antimreoir If you are talking about hobby points, I have that set as unspent for now. The core points are all used up.
 
No they're not, you have a racial boost in Strength Training, meaning you have only spent 45.
 
@Antimreoir Made the requested changes, added points across shielding and fist combat, all of the points should now be used.
 
Need a new reviewer. Only changes made are the archblood rework.
 
Hey there, I'll be taking over the review for your character app! @Koyote

I've decided to suggest the following edits:

  • While Bomani's Archblood affliction is insinuated by the Primal Loyalty pack listed beneath Abilities, you'll need to detail that in clearer fashion at the top of your application.
Koyote said:
Religion:

None
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  • Also, if they do possess the Primal Loyalty pack, that would require a level of Dragon Loyalty, or working with the Matron of the Regalian Dragon Cult. For these reasons, it is very unlikely that your character would be totally non-religious.
Koyote said:
15+20+10, +5 Herculean =50
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  • The body stat limit for Rakhet Asha is 40, you are 10 points over the max.
  • In deeper regards to your point-spread, it orients too much on combat to the point of min-maxing. Please provide a healthier balance to Bomani's skillset. What are their day-to-day hobbies, what do they like to do besides fighting?
  • Lastly, there are quite a few issues with the Life Story. So far, it orients solely around combat. Not only would it be worth exploring Bomani as a character beyond an intent for CRP, but having them strictly unbeatable would not gracefully transfer to actual combat you'll run into on the server. Also, it's mentioned that they fought in war, but it isn't ever specified which one(s). The final point I'd add with the Life Story is that claiming notoriety is generally frowned upon, and that it's a far more rewarding process to make a rise to fame through server roleplay.
Please make the appropriate edits in red & tag me once done, thanks!
 
@microwavemmm Lots of changes and fixes to the requested changes which are now in red.
- Removed a few categories of combat as it were too much and only kept 30 prof maximum of combat.
- There was a mistake made with Herculean genetics. I had bought Arcanology but Herculean disallows the use of that point buy so my mistake on that. The changes to the points are in red.
-The points that added up to 50 from earlier were just the calculation of body stat without the racial limit and then the actual number placed on the bottom of Body Limit. However I removed that entirely and added the proper limit to the request.
-The abilities aren't in red as the spoiler category doesn't allow for it however its in spoiler and has the full description of abilities given to Bomani based on his attunement/loyalty.
-Significant increase to backstory in order to make it fair, less op, less "unbeatable" and more of an accurate description to suit what Bomani has gotten into, is like, and what hes done in IC up until now.
 
@Koyote Clarify Bomani's Archblood affliction at the top of their application (in Basic Information), switch out that +5 Arcanology for something allowed by the Herculean trait (I would urge for another non-combative proficiency), & you're good to go.
While ideally there should still be more to the Life Story than combat, I'll just drop that as a suggestion.

Tag me once done!
 
@microwavemmm Might I be able to swap it out for something else or keep it as arcanology? There isn't exactly much I could choose from that would allow the basic meta/usage for something with Herculean. I'm not planning on using sorcery for the asha as per the new update nor do I want to get into clockwork. Also is metallurgy allowed for an asha with Herculean?
 
Koyote said:
@microwavemmm Might I be able to swap it out for something else or keep it as arcanology? There isn't exactly much I could choose from that would allow the basic meta/usage for something with Herculean. I'm not planning on using sorcery for the asha as per the new update nor do I want to get into clockwork. Also is metallurgy allowed for an asha with Herculean?
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With the Herculean trait, your character isn't allowed to invest in Arcanology, Roguery, Schooling, Linguistics, or the Science Skill category. Metallurgy is still an option, however. Use the points that would've been put into Arcanology however you'd like, as long as it's compliant with the restrictions of the Herculean trait & not excessively stacking up on combat. Or, you could alternatively get rid of the trait altogether if you'd rather access those points.
 
Changed style of fist combat to jiujutsu and judo
 
@microwavemmm Did a few changes to the points and added in ranged chain/flail combat. Will put app in review when I finish the entire format.

Removal of old Arcanology had been spread across new combat sections. I put in Chained Warlash and blunt since there isn't exactly a section for wielding a handleless chain weapon.
 
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Actually put it in review anyways. I will be doing the format though it may take a while.
 
@Koyote Before I give this app the go-ahead, I'll request that you invest in 2 different combat categories at most, & also limit your spending in combat proficiencies to 20 points total. Redirecting those leftover points into more Hobbies would help balance your sheet as well. When I see more investments that aren't combat-focused or utilized in raids, you'll likely be able to expand beyond the "2 combat category" restriction.

Koyote said:
Arcanology +6(Core)
-Ward Knowledge
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  • Also, make sure you're not wasting 3 points! You've only counted the Ward Knowledge pack, so that'd only be 3 points into Arcanology, not 6. :)
Koyote said:
Points 50 - 10 - 10 - 8 - 6 - 3 - 3 = 0 remaining points.
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  • The correct calculation for your current point set up (if we first make sure that the "6" in Arcanology is actually reduced to a "3") would be: 10 + 8 + 6 + 3 + 10 + 5 + 3 = 45. When changing up your spread with the appropriate edits, make sure to keep this in mind.
Tag me once done, thanks!
 
@microwavemmm Finished with the changes, thank you for pointing out the missing points. Also is the blunt combat alone acceptable for the weapon shown in spoiler? I have no idea what that would fall under and left it simply as blunt and changed it to the proper meteor hammers so it makes sense. Per Linguistics and Arcanology, I'll make sure these are noted within the new summary of the new format. Working on this.
 
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Koyote said:
@microwavemmm Finished with the changes, thank you for pointing out the missing points. Also is the blunt combat alone acceptable for the weapon shown in spoiler? I have no idea what that would fall under and left it simply as blunt and changed it to the proper meteor hammers so it makes sense. Per Linguistics and Arcanology, I'll make sure these are noted within the new summary of the new format. Working on this.
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Thank you for correcting the points, all looks good there! :) Also, the image of the weapon depicted seems to be a double steel ball bola, so it'd actually fall under Bola Combat, not Blunt Combat. @Koyote
 
@microwavemmm By putting it under Bola Combat, It could still be wielded in the sense that I'd actually fight people/hit them with the steel ball? Because the intent is not to snare/trap them but hit them with the ball itself and utilizing the chains to do so. I changed it to Bola combat just incase but I will not be using any of the mundane abilities granted from Bola Combat. Also the image itself I took off of the actual Meteor Hammers that come from the shaolin set of weapons.
 
Koyote said:
@microwavemmm By putting it under Bola Combat, It could still be wielded in the sense that I'd actually fight people/hit them with the steel ball? Because the intent is not to snare/trap them but hit them with the ball itself and utilizing the chains to do so. I changed it to Bola combat just incase but I will not be using any of the mundane abilities granted from Bola Combat. Also the image itself I took off of the actual Meteor Hammers that come from the shaolin set of weapons.
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Ahh, gotcha - my mistake then, I misunderstood! In that case, the closest proficiency representation for Meteor Hammers would fall under Warlash Combat, which covers the use of any weapons that are flexible. I definitely won't make you categorize that into Bola if you never intended to use it as a Bola. :) Tag me once you've got everything sorted & I'll mark you for approval. @Koyote
 
@microwavemmm Everything should be in order. I'm expecting to finish the format in the coming weeks, just been busy.
 
@microwavemmm Reverted the meteor hammer/warlash and gave him only fist combat again. Didn't like the change and it were complicated
 
@microwavemmm Removed archbloodism as per the update. Bomani will not be an Archon. Not updating the rest further until the big prof update.
 
Approved.
 
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