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Please.. stay a little longer..
Rosana had her cheek resting on her palm, looking out the window - just another night that he had not come home, and though she had been faithful, she couldn't help but wonder.. Who could he be out there with - that kept him away? Memories flashed of a girl and him.. and her sadness deepened... The rain poured outside and she felt unmotivated to move.. hanging onto each word he had said to her in the past.. when Ayla and Skye even tried to make her mood better.. nothing was working and she dug herself deeper into her hovel of blankets. Nothing could bring back the smile that could light up a room, instead it looked more pained...
"And I told you to be patient..."
Doubt seeped in - was she not pretty enough? Was she just not enough? Staring into the mirror and looking at her body.. her stomach - she was curvy, and a bit chubby.. looking at her weight and her thighs.. and then at her face... she started thinking down of herself, the once confident woman's esteem starting to fall apart... Her eyes were either too big or too small, her ears were too droopy, her lips were too puffy.. until she was tearing herself apart piece by piece, her skin too pale, her hair too white-blue, not soft enough, not enough pretty clothing.. Never.. enough, and it only got worse and worse as the days went on - her depression getting worse...
"In the morning I'll be with you - but it'll be a different kind.."
Then Denial started to creep up her steps. "He couldn't be cheating on me... He would never do that, he's just being held up. Perhaps something went wrong? Nooo, perhaps he's just been busy? He'll get home soon." She kept telling herself things to make herself feel better when in reality.. she knew he wasn't coming home.. she just didn't want to admit it.. pushing her friends away - and lying with a smile. "I'm fine." the words repeated.. and repeated.. and repeated.. until she was stuck in the rut of never telling how she really felt. Voices in her head telling her just how worthless she was - and how she'd never be good enough for him.
"Come on skinny love... what happened here?"
She became desperate to ease her pain in her heart - trying to find out... Was he missing? Was he not happy with her anymore? Did he find someone else? All of these questions in her mind - she was getting desperate for answers. The pain and loneliness within her heart grieving further... Forcing a smile to her friends and pretending she was okay just a little longer.. she was going to break soon but she couldn't let it out.. screaming but the only thing that escaped was bubbles as she started to drown - feeling as if a chain was pulling her down.. she felt more tired - and her appetite dropped.. insecurities forming..
"Then who the hell was I?"
Crying herself to sleep again - she missed him, she hated warming a bed for two - that would only ever have one beside her. She got up wiping her eyes and looked out the window.. "Love is so mad.. Love is so mad.. make me your doll - what's left of me you can erase.. I'm so sick of this fake love.. fake love... I'm so sorry but it's fake love." she hummed the song softly - narrowing her eyes as she wiped away her tears.. looking down at the ground.. "I'll fake that I'm stronger because everything is all for you wish that a love all on its own could be perfect.."
"Come on skinny love just last the year.."
She was dreaming, that she was in his arms - he was holding her as they laughed and smiled. Love and adoration in both of there eyes as they were together.. however the scene started to deterioate and burn, and the image's she saw of him with another woman - caressing her cheek caused her to drop the flowers in her hand.. soon waking up... "Even though I'm crying out.. I'll hide all my feelings and keep smiling for you.." she let out the hum as tears slid down her face and she wiped them away. Though she closed her eyes and forced herself sleep.. In which they were in a forest, sitting across from one another.. he stood up and walked towards her but disappeared in a black-foggy smoke before he could touch her..
"Now all your love is wasted?"
She needed to break - and break away, needed someone to tell her problems too.. but all she could see was the loneliness deep within - she couldn't make herself be vocal and tell someone her problems, because if she tried water would fill her lungs... She felt more and more alone.. and even started to push away the people she loved.
She needed to break - and break away, needed someone to tell her problems too.. but all she could see was the loneliness deep within - she couldn't make herself be vocal and tell someone her problems, because if she tried water would fill her lungs... She felt more and more alone.. and even started to push away the people she loved.
"Who will fall far behind..?"
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