"...Right. I had a woman back then. Before I forbade myself from loving. There was a woman. A woman I got close with. Very close."
Her name was Angel, how could he ever forget that name? Resting back in his white sheeted bed in the middle of the darkened, gloomy four walls he called his room; Edward reached for the pipe he filled with a tincture of opium. The opium was routine. While sacrificing his mood into the darkness that overshadowed the room, Edward inhaled from the opium pipe he had carefully prepared, resting backwards in his bed and allowing his baggy eyes to come to a close. This was the only way he could ever fall asleep. He had to whirl his mind if he ever wanted to receive the pleasure of escaping from his reality. But whenever he dreamed, he dreamed of two things. Either one, or the other. The first would usually be displeasant flashbacks from the Ranger Crisis, memories of fallen he had never truly gotten over. The second... a woman. Surely, Edward had gotten used to seeing men die, but seeing lovers die was simply a pain he hadn't ever dared to register for. He closed his eyes while the smoke manifested into the room, and there began the dream.
He was merely fourteen years old when he found out that there was something more beautiful than the clouds. The loving smile of a woman. He felt something completely unfamiliar at the sight, feeling his knees go weak, as if he had suddenly lost the capability to function. His bright blue eyes glistened as the lovely little lady traded names with him. "My name is Angel. Mama named me Angel because she says I'm gonna brighten peoples hearts when I grow up." Edward felt his heart sink into the depths of affection at the words spoken by Angel. He immediately gave his name. The exchange had come to pass relatively quick, and the two found theirselves in a friendship that thoroughly sent Edward's emotions into a spiral of confusion and excitement.
- + -
Years had come to pass and their loyal friendship evolved into what eventually became Edward's first taste of love. Two young virgins traded their innocence in one curious night, and in eachothers arms, swore to be together until the end of their lives. That night, Edward settled the deal in his mind. This woman would be the woman he was going to put a ring on. The young man was already dreaming of the future now. A townhouse, sitting by the fireplace with two beautiful children, and his beautiful wife, Angel, right next to him, fingers intertwined. He was slapped back to reality by an unexpected statement that came from Angel. "Edward, I have to tell you something important... I am sick."
How unfair. Edward began to mentally curse at fate. Thoughts clouded his mind. He took Angel's petite little hands in his, thumbs caressing the delicate textures of the skin that covered her thin fingers. He looked into her eyes, his own filled with worry and concern. "I want to know the details, Angel." Angel looked back, staring at him. Tears began to fill her eyes. "They said I'll get worse throughout the years... I don't know what's going to happen, Edward... And I'm so scared." The words affected Edward's heart in a feeling that accurately felt like getting crushed between two stones. Wrapping his arms around her, he looked upon her face, promising with loving tones. "No matter what happens, I'll take care of you. I won't let you suffer."
"I promise. I won't let you suffer, Angel."
- + -
At the age of twenty six, Edward Jarsdel returned from war with his brothers. Each three of them were mentally affected in more ways than one, having experienced brutalizing situations, memories that would forever be carved into their psychology for the rest of their lives. Edward had one worry in his mind; the situation of Angel. He began to run down the roads of Dawnton in pursuit of reaching the clinic Angel had become bedridden in. Yes, Angel's health had indeed been getting worse throughout the years that passed. First, the illness stole from Angel's beauty and gradually turned her into a woman hard to look at. And slowly, it began to eat away from Angel's mind and sanity. She was no longer capable of moving her body, and as such, was to be trapped in a bed forever. Edward made it a priority for himself to stand by her side for the rest of the time she had left in her sorry world. There would be times he doubted his decision, when he thought about finding a new woman. Though, whenever he thought about leaving, he was hit by painful guilt and regret, and he reminded himself the promise he made her years ago. "I won't let you suffer, Angel. I'll be with you through it all, my love." One day, Angel apologized to Edward. For not being beautiful anymore. For not being able to satisfy him anymore. And most above all, not being able to be with him forever anymore.
Times got tougher and tougher for Edward and Angel. Physical pain was inevitable for Angel. The pains came, and were followed by screams that echoed in the corridors of the clinic she resided in. Every night, the painful shrieks and yells of Angel would echo in the halls as a result of her tormenting pain and suffering. Edward immediately began to investigate for a solution, anything to calm her nerves, something that could make the pain tolerable, a remedy to make it go away. Doctors after doctors, researches upon researches, but nothing seemed to heal Angel. The stress took it's toll on Edward. "You said you would brighten my fucking life, Angel!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. He reached for the first object he could grab, a glass bottle. He smashed it into a wall, and started to wreck the room, before dropping to his knees, weakened. His palms covered his face, and at the spot, he began to cry his eyes out. "Angel... I won't let you suffer."
- + -
One cold night, Edward walked into Angel's clinic room. She was asleep. Edward walked over to her bedside, and casted a glance towards her horribly disfigured face, a result of the illness that she had suffered from. He sat down by her side and grabbed her hand, and watched her sleep for hours. Sleep was her salvation, the only place she got freedom from the pain. Edward knew she was dying slowly and extremely painfully, and so, he reminded her sleeping face the promise he made her years ago. "Angel... I love you. I don't want you to suffer. You are in so much pain everyday-- and so am I, seeing you like that. Hearing your screams. I promised you I would never let you suffer... so, please forgive me for what I am about to do."
Edward leant down to plant a kiss on her forehead. He stroked her face caressingly, and whispered her good night, before stuffing her face with her pillow and holding it there until she would no longer breathe.
"...Right. I had a woman back then. Before I forbade myself from loving. There was a woman. A woman I got close with. Very close."
Her name was Angel, how could he ever forget that name? Resting back in his white sheeted bed in the middle of the darkened, gloomy four walls he called his room; Edward reached for the pipe he filled with a tincture of opium. The opium was routine. While sacrificing his mood into the darkness that overshadowed the room, Edward inhaled from the opium pipe he had carefully prepared, resting backwards in his bed and allowing his baggy eyes to come to a close. This was the only way he could ever fall asleep. He had to whirl his mind if he ever wanted to receive the pleasure of escaping from his reality. But whenever he dreamed, he dreamed of two things. Either one, or the other. The first would usually be displeasant flashbacks from the Ranger Crisis, memories of fallen he had never truly gotten over. The second... a woman. Surely, Edward had gotten used to seeing men die, but seeing lovers die was simply a pain he hadn't ever dared to register for. He closed his eyes while the smoke manifested into the room, and there began the dream.
He was merely fourteen years old when he found out that there was something more beautiful than the clouds. The loving smile of a woman. He felt something completely unfamiliar at the sight, feeling his knees go weak, as if he had suddenly lost the capability to function. His bright blue eyes glistened as the lovely little lady traded names with him. "My name is Angel. Mama named me Angel because she says I'm gonna brighten peoples hearts when I grow up." Edward felt his heart sink into the depths of affection at the words spoken by Angel. He immediately gave his name. The exchange had come to pass relatively quick, and the two found theirselves in a friendship that thoroughly sent Edward's emotions into a spiral of confusion and excitement.
- + -
Years had come to pass and their loyal friendship evolved into what eventually became Edward's first taste of love. Two young virgins traded their innocence in one curious night, and in eachothers arms, swore to be together until the end of their lives. That night, Edward settled the deal in his mind. This woman would be the woman he was going to put a ring on. The young man was already dreaming of the future now. A townhouse, sitting by the fireplace with two beautiful children, and his beautiful wife, Angel, right next to him, fingers intertwined. He was slapped back to reality by an unexpected statement that came from Angel. "Edward, I have to tell you something important... I am sick."
How unfair. Edward began to mentally curse at fate. Thoughts clouded his mind. He took Angel's petite little hands in his, thumbs caressing the delicate textures of the skin that covered her thin fingers. He looked into her eyes, his own filled with worry and concern. "I want to know the details, Angel." Angel looked back, staring at him. Tears began to fill her eyes. "They said I'll get worse throughout the years... I don't know what's going to happen, Edward... And I'm so scared." The words affected Edward's heart in a feeling that accurately felt like getting crushed between two stones. Wrapping his arms around her, he looked upon her face, promising with loving tones. "No matter what happens, I'll take care of you. I won't let you suffer."
"I promise. I won't let you suffer, Angel."
- + -
At the age of twenty six, Edward Jarsdel returned from war with his brothers. Each three of them were mentally affected in more ways than one, having experienced brutalizing situations, memories that would forever be carved into their psychology for the rest of their lives. Edward had one worry in his mind; the situation of Angel. He began to run down the roads of Dawnton in pursuit of reaching the clinic Angel had become bedridden in. Yes, Angel's health had indeed been getting worse throughout the years that passed. First, the illness stole from Angel's beauty and gradually turned her into a woman hard to look at. And slowly, it began to eat away from Angel's mind and sanity. She was no longer capable of moving her body, and as such, was to be trapped in a bed forever. Edward made it a priority for himself to stand by her side for the rest of the time she had left in her sorry world. There would be times he doubted his decision, when he thought about finding a new woman. Though, whenever he thought about leaving, he was hit by painful guilt and regret, and he reminded himself the promise he made her years ago. "I won't let you suffer, Angel. I'll be with you through it all, my love." One day, Angel apologized to Edward. For not being beautiful anymore. For not being able to satisfy him anymore. And most above all, not being able to be with him forever anymore.
Times got tougher and tougher for Edward and Angel. Physical pain was inevitable for Angel. The pains came, and were followed by screams that echoed in the corridors of the clinic she resided in. Every night, the painful shrieks and yells of Angel would echo in the halls as a result of her tormenting pain and suffering. Edward immediately began to investigate for a solution, anything to calm her nerves, something that could make the pain tolerable, a remedy to make it go away. Doctors after doctors, researches upon researches, but nothing seemed to heal Angel. The stress took it's toll on Edward. "You said you would brighten my fucking life, Angel!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. He reached for the first object he could grab, a glass bottle. He smashed it into a wall, and started to wreck the room, before dropping to his knees, weakened. His palms covered his face, and at the spot, he began to cry his eyes out. "Angel... I won't let you suffer."
- + -
One cold night, Edward walked into Angel's clinic room. She was asleep. Edward walked over to her bedside, and casted a glance towards her horribly disfigured face, a result of the illness that she had suffered from. He sat down by her side and grabbed her hand, and watched her sleep for hours. Sleep was her salvation, the only place she got freedom from the pain. Edward knew she was dying slowly and extremely painfully, and so, he reminded her sleeping face the promise he made her years ago. "Angel... I love you. I don't want you to suffer. You are in so much pain everyday-- and so am I, seeing you like that. Hearing your screams. I promised you I would never let you suffer... so, please forgive me for what I am about to do."
Edward leant down to plant a kiss on her forehead. He stroked her face caressingly, and whispered her good night, before stuffing her face with her pillow and holding it there until she would no longer breathe.
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