Preserved Sheet Ra'kanuuk, Pilfering Rat

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Gen_tlemen

look at my BLOUSE
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Basic Information

  • Full Name: Ra'Kanuuk​
  • Age: 22​
  • Gender: Male​
  • Race: Rashaq​
  • Main Ambition: Wealth Acquisition​
Visual Information
  • Eye Color: Sage Green
  • Hair Color: Blonde
  • Hair Style: Frizzy medium length
  • Skin Color: Tan
  • Clothing: Simple Tan Tunic, brown slacks, belt.​
  • Height: 3'11"​
  • Weight: 74 lbs​
  • Body Build: Average​
  • Weapon of Choice: Caster shadow magic, both schools.

Personality and Abilities

Personality Traits
  • Dishonest - Ra'Kanuuk fakes being unintelligent in order to receive handouts. He's in fact rather educated street-wise, and lies to his advantage. Unfortunately, this lands him in hot water when making friends, or trying to remember his web of lies. He does not keep relationships for long.
  • Creative - Ra'Kanuuk is able to create and improvise on the fly, whether it be for heist plans or just making a meal out of common garbage. Another word for this would be adaptable, in the sense that he can creatively change to his environment and the situation he is currently in.
  • Extraverted - He enjoys the company of all races, and is rather jovial when not on a mission. His serious disposition melts away when he is comfortable with the surroundings. In most cases, he enjoys an ale while recreationally bonding with friends.
  • Thrill-Seeker - Ra'Kanuuk enjoys the feeling of adrenaline far more than he should. Stealing valuable objects when he can gives him a sense of superiority over the imperceptive hubble of daily life. He enjoys heists with heights, and will take a dangerous path if it means he can enjoy the feeling of freedom it gives.
  • Hobbyist - Ra'Kanuuk enjoys making jewelry, arts and crafts, and generally any creative hobby. He likes wood carving, jewelry making, and cosmetics and clothing design. His attraction to these hobbies is from his years with the nomadic carnie group, where he learned to make stage props and costumes for shows.
  • Empathetic to a Fault - While not given any attention as a child, he learned to provide and care for others because of his jovial predisposition. He will share his food with those who are poor, even if it mean going hungry. He also has a policy against stealing from other impoverished races. Meeting the wrong little girl in a noble home will melt his heart, and he will abandon post if he gets too uncomfortable.
Strengths
  • Master of Disguise - In his years with the Carnie nomads, he performed as an actor. He learned makeup skills, costume tailoring, and voice inflection changes that make him an impeccable liar. He can speak multiple languages and has a silver tongue that can influence even a strong-willed noble.​
  • Perceptive - The Rashaq has impressive hearing abilities due to his large dish-like ears. He can hear a pin drop while people are talking, and uses this ability to locate and steal fallen coins. He also has above-average vision, not needing glasses for any occasion. This allows him to spot wallets and valuables across crowded rooms, and slither his way to them with ease.​
  • Shadow Magic - As a caster, he is attuned to his magic. He is a caster in both schools, using them to his advantage when stealing, sneaking, or other nefarious activities. He uses his creative side to ink runes into his clothes and the hilt of his dagger, making for quick use in dire situations.
Weaknesses
  • No Weapon Abilities- Not having time to train in weaponry, nor having the appropriate body type to do so, Ra'Kanuuk is physically weak. His studies in Shadow Magic do not give him time nor means to exercise, and thus he is combat ineffective with any weapon. He struggles in non magical combat strongly.
  • Emotionally Sensitive - Ra'Kanuuk struggles with his emotions, and is hot headed and outspoken. He has trouble with Ailor especially, having some rather strong feelings toward the slavery accords. He hates confrontation as well, and will flee from fights or even simple arguments.
  • Stubborn - This rashaq is strong in his opinions, which further emphasizes his emotional instability. He does not like being challenged, and would rather state his opinion and leave before being confronted about it. He is solid in his dispositions, and nothing is able to change his opinions. This often gets him into conflict, as he will state his opinions around guards, and flaunt his heretical views publicly.


Life Story
  • Born 282 AC to two healthy adult Rashaq in the slums area of Regalia​
  • Spent childhood working on petty thievery skills by stealing breads, fruits, and small jewels.​
  • Kept himself afloat in his early years in the performing arts industry, where he learned to act.​
  • Picked up Shadow Magic at the age of 14 while working in the performing arts industry. For the the utility of stealing items and temporarily storing them in the Void for future use.​



Two rather impoverished Rashaq parents become accidentally pregnant. Without access to conctraceptive herbs or contraception at all, the couple is forced into having the child, despite better wishings of their pack alpha to abstain from procreating this year.


Their pack alpha, Rohk-Liima, was the head of a travelling band of carnie-esque characters. Their group was rather nomadic, and had only taken refuge in the slums for a few months to allow a new generation to be sired.
Ra'Kanuuk was born on the 27th of August, 287. No love was spared in the raising of this child, save for small trinkets as tokens of affection. His mother and father busied themselves in their acts as carnival workers, and gave as little attention to Ra'Kanuuk as possible without him turning into a sociopath.


The group was not initially keen to stealing goods from others, but the impoverished conditions of Alorian racial wealth barriers stopped them from living a comfortable life without pilfering.
When Rashaq in this band of misfits matured at the age of ten to eleven, they were taught basic skills for dishonest acts, including disguise, lockpicking, and several languages. Every Rashaq in the clan learnt at least 5 languages before they turned fifteen.


Ra'Kanuuk, at the age of fourteen, picked up Shadow Magic as a primary skill in his efforts to steal. The use of Devoid Magic was learnt first to Caster level, as it was a clever and useful way to transport pilfered objects. Shadow Meld was learned to Caster level next, as it provided a reliable way to transport himself beyond walls and doors that were otherwise solid barriers. He designed his own runes, making use of sigils created from Ra Language as well as symbols inspired from the writ of Dwarven languages, which he found to be satisfactorily geometric.

His runes are carved into the back of regal coins, making for reusable glyphs on durable surfaces. He picked up this trick from his father, who helped design runes for other mages, while not being one himself.

The carnie group disbanded in his fifteenth year, right after he finished learning Humorrin for his rune studies. The disband was due to the pack alpha being captured and executed above ground in Regalia after failing to steal a sapphire necklace off the neck of a deathling.


Currently, under the rule of Freya Lo, Ra'Kanuuk found his way into an unlawful trade caravan known as The Wahalla. He respects the other members, and formed somewhat of a pack of his own, now that he lacked an alpha to look up to.

He spends his days working out and planning heists with the Mu-Allar boss of the caravan, utilizing his knowledge of sewer passageways and shadow magic to exploit weaknesses within city limits. He also has been working on plans to set up a bootleg business offshoot of the caravans, using his shadow magic to transport himself from within the confines of the Regalian blockades into the wilderness, where he can meet up with allied burglary businesses who run outside of the city.
 
Last edited:
Hello! Here's my review!

Caster Shadow Magic for Utility
  • What subform of Shadow Magic? I know it is stated later on in the app, but it is important for clarification when doing player quests or for basic knowledge of the character in general. Why isn't this listed in his strengths?
  • All of Ra'Kanuuk's personality traits are positive. I'd like you to have a balanced about of positive and negative traits, or neutral, positive and negative traits.
Stealthy - Ra-Kanuuk, due to his small size, is able to slip in and out of buildings quite undetected. He uses his good sense of hearing to detect the locations of people, and cleverly avoids them using shadow magic or stealthy habits. He is light footed and light fingered, allowing him expertise in the area of pickpocketing.
  • Perhaps removing the stealthiness, as it's already somewhat implied given his race, and instead make this about his Shadow Magic and how he utilizes it, exactly?
  • Combat Ineffective - The small creature is only 74 lbs on average, meaning he can be picked up and thrown against a wall by any larger race and be incapacitated for months. His bones are small and easily broken. In addition, his use of shadow magic has prevented him from learning dagger skills to any large degree.

  • Bad Memory - Due to a head injury he sustained while on a recent heist, a concussion, his memory falters beyond a few weeks back. While he can remember important life events, he may forget a planned heist and leave his compatriots in the dark.

  • Prone to Drug Addictions - His thrill-seeking, adrenaline-junkie tendencies land him in hot water with substance abuse. When not seeking out the high of life, he seeks out the high of opium. He is also a dedicated Tabacca smoker, and has a set of unique carved wooden pipes he prefers to use.

  • Empathetic to a Fault - While not given any attention as a child, he learned to provide and care for others because of his jovial predisposition. He will share his food with those who are poor, even if it mean going hungry. He also has a policy against stealing from other impoverished races. Meeting the wrong little girl in a noble home will melt his heart, and he will abandon post if he gets too uncomfortable.

  • Most, if not all of your weaknesses are cop-outs. While their general concepts may remain the same, they need to be heavily emphasized or completely replaced. For further clarification, see the points below.
    • Being weak in combat is a given, for his race, and due to him having mage status. His stealthiness and skill in Shadow Magic seems to make up for his lack of combat ability.
      Racial Weaknesses: If you play a klein, of course they're so small and lightweight they can be easily thrown about or knocked back. You don't need to highlight that as a weakness, because it's already a given. This goes for a dwarf being stout and slow, or a dakkar being frowned upon in society.
    • If Ra'Kanuuk can remember important life events, why is it really a weakness? I don't feel as if this will be played out much.
    • Being prone to addiction isn't a true weakness either. While it might certainly be an issue for real-life people, it's hard to play out addiction with serious concequences in RP. However, if you emphasize this, it can work as a weakness.
    • Being Empathetic is more of a personality trait rather than a strength or weakness, given how you phrased it.
  • If one of Ra'Kanuuk's weaknesses is his failing memory, how does he remember casts? Balancing two subforms can be difficult, especially for a race that isn't the most intelligent. I believe having Student-Caster in the subforms would be more fitting.
  • I understand that there's a lot of work to be done on this character application, and I believe it's best that I reject this so that you may have more time to work on it and really hone this character. I will say, however, it's a great concept! It simply needs a little fine tuning in terms of the negative aspects of the character. If you have any questions or comments about the review, feel free to shoot me a Forum PM!
 
Submitting for re-review. Changes are all colored.
 
I will be reviewing this character sheet.


You currently have 5 traits when you need at least 6. Since you seem to be going with the 2 positive and 2 negative traits, plus one neutral, add in another neutral trait in order to meet the requirements.

Other than that, this sheet is very well written! I love the detail and creativity you've implemented with your character. I see no other issues with it.

Make any changes in blue, then tag me when you're done. @Betterer
 
Very good! I call this sheet approved!