Preserved Sheet Nicolo Celso

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fuithlug

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Nicolo Celso.

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Basic Information:

Full Name: Nicolo Celso.
Age: 25.
Race: Ailor, Dressolini.
Gender: Male.
Main Ambition: To continue to improve his combat ability.

Proficiencies:
Proficiency.



    • Combat.
      • +15 Thin Blades Combat, invested.
    • Arts.
      • +10 Musical Arts, Culture.
    • Body.
      • +5 Athletics Training, invested.
      • +5 Rogue Training, invested.
    • Body Shape:
      • Physical Stat: 30
      • Body Shape: Ripped.
      • Body Fat: Extreme Low.
Languages.
  • Dressolo, fluent (10).
  • Commons, fluent (9).
Visual Information:
Eye Colour: Hazel.
Hair Colour: Brown.
Hair Style: Short back and sides, with a midlength top.
Skin Colour: Olive.
Clothing: Hard wearing travelling clothes.
Height: 5'10"
Weapon of Choice: Basket Rapier and parrying dagger.

Personality and Abilities.

  • First Paragraph: Of late, Nico is often perceived as rather unruly as a result of his newfound scruffy appearance - a result of how much time he's been spending in the sewers. He is however, undoubtedly determined and staunchly loyal to those who help him. Those few that recognise his name from his work in the Bulwark Sword or his winning of the Vultarin tournament might see him in a different light however, possibly even ranging from washed up in his current state or fiercely undaunting.
  • Second Paragraph: Nico is constantly challenging himself, he refuses to be comfortable in one position for too long. This is a result of his deep-seated daddy issues that have always had him undervalue himself. He regards himself as highly skilled and well trained, which he is, but always strives to be better. His upbringing and treatment as a child also affect this self-depreciation and has resulted in him tending to spend more time with those in society that are considered lesser, for example, his closest friends have been Isldar, Solang or disgraced nobles. This trivialised opinion of himself does not however stop him from believing that he is one of the most capable swordsmen around, stemming from his ultimately strong-willed and competitive personality. Perhaps the most notable aspect of his personality is his ceaseless need to improve himself.
  • Third Paragraph: Nico is ultimately very open and light-hearted with his friends and family. Those that he would call friends are as close to him as his family are because of how much they've been through in Regalia, from spying in the sewers to rebelling against undead dictators. With his lover, he is most notably understanding and almost sympathetic, he puts his partner through difficult situations time and time again as a result of his dangerous lines of work and his frequent visits back to Montania. His family and friends often consider him to be hard-working, loyal, and unfathomably resolute in his morality if not a little bit naïve.
  • Fourth Paragraph: Probably best described as 'lawful neutral' - Nico strives for fairness above all else. He is dutiful and reliable when it comes to serving those who have served him well, which happens to be in this case the Kade family. He is more than happy to carry out orders and trusts in authority figures for the most part. He has an unmoving enmity for Sanguine as a result of his experiences throughout life and a general scepticism towards mages despite many of his family members practicing magic. Whilst observing others' corruption or evil actions, Nico will more than likely act, he has a sort of saviour-complex that has gotten him into plenty of awful situations - a great deal of his injuries have been sustained as a result of this.

Life Story:
Childhood:
Nicolo was born surrounded by ragged flags and the braying of the gypsy steeds in the countryside of Gallovia. The Celso family, of Dressolini descent emigrated to Gallovia in the earlier years of the second century A.C. Nicolo was told young whose child he was, and it didn't really affect him until later in his life, being the son of a rich merchant and a gypsy is quite the mix. He lived a relatively playful first ten years of his life learning the gypsy ways, while his mother taught him to read and write. He played with the children and animals that belonged to the troupe and played about the many streams and fields they inhabited. At this stage he could speak a fair chunk of common and Dressolini at this point and knew a fair chunk about the local flora and how it could be used in medical and other circumstances.

He played with the other children, creating various (now faded) relationships as he aged. His best friend Elizabeth or 'Lizzy' was chief amongst his group of pals. Lizzy's grandfather had previously been the loyal guard of a noble lord, fighting in various wars and conflicts, Nico would sit and listen for hours while Elizabeth grew bored and played with Nico's hair, from this man would Nico learn the values he upholds today, of chivalry and honour. Nico learnt a lot from his time with the old man and developed a much broader taste in humour (as the old man was quite crude in the jokes he told, though also dabbled in sarcasm). Amongst all the many things the Elizabeth's grandfather taught Nico, the most notable has to be a dabbling in swordplay. They'd spar with sticks by the river as Lizzy swam and played, the old man taught Nico the basics and sparked his interest, soon he was running home each night telling his mother about how he wanted to become a brilliant swordsman, better than all others.

Adolescence:
Nico continued his small amount of training and his friendship with Elizabeth blossomed alongside his sword arm's capability. His mother was growing restless however, concerned of the future her son would have in a small gypsy troupe. She began leaving early in the morning and returning late in the afternoon. She'd smell strange to Nico, of the dipping oil Nico had his bread with, which later Nico learnt was the strong smell of olive oil. His mother went through a rapid change of persona over the month that followed, she was more optimistic and playful than she ever had been.

On Nicolo's tenth birthday he received a visit from a tall man in strange silken clothing, armed with a sword and an accent more acute and proper than his own. It didn't take long for Nicolo to realise the man was his father and that he was only just made aware of his son's existence. What followed was a conversation between his mother and father than was half argument and half apology from both sides as they had equal rights to be angry and apologetic for their actions. Overall a decision was made, Nicolo would move to one of the larger cities in Montania to study swordplay and become a man, his father would pay for it and his mother would not expose the relationship she and Nicolo's father had.

Nicolo trained hard and passionately, developing a love of sport and duelling, his classmates varied in ages and ability, teaching Nicolo humility and maturity as he developed his skills. He soon became a model pupil, sparring with his teachers and older students, making a name for himself within the academy. He finished learning the language Dressolo, and could read and write efficiently. He faced various prodigies like himself at the school however and failed against some of them, Barbose Holham was one such rival. The two instantly hit it off on their first meeting, becoming close friends and rivals, they sparred daily with each other, discussing their feelings and thoughts of home.


Adulthood:
He studied a few more years before deciding to leave his tutor, he parted ways with his close friend Barbose, and sailed towards the heart of the empire. His eyes now set on a new goal, to make his own father recognise him as his son and therefore garner a name and inheritance for himself and future family. Nico has arrived in Regalia, challenging the large base of combatants to duels and sparring matches to prove to himself and his father how far he has come.

Upon arriving in Regalia, Nicolo quickly made plenty of friends, aspiring nobles, high nobles, gang leaders and commoners alike. He eventually took up several jobs to make ends meet, becoming an informant for Jared Kade, a fencing tutor for Sigurna Wodenstaff, a bouncer for the Golden Willow tavern and most notably, joining the Bulwark swords - first under Jared Kade, then under Tristan Kade. He has taken part in two separate fencing tournaments in Vultaro, coming second due to an altercation with a cheating fencer, and coming first, earning the title of 'Championa' and becoming the best fencer in the Empire, at least for a while. Nicolo spent time travelling between the last loyalist bastions and hunts through the city with the deathling occupation, looking for fellow Bulwark swords to rally. Over the course of the winter of 304 A.C. Upon helping the Marigold rebels free various high-flying government officials and ending the Lo occupation he left the city.

After returning, Nicolo had a brief tenure in the Black Hand but ultimately resigned, striving to become more recognised for his physical and combat prowess. He returned to the City recently after having partaken in tournaments throughout the Archipelago, most particularly in Montania, Rivellia and Girobalda.
 
Last edited:
This is an amazing application and it was honestly hard to find any opportunities in it. Just a few quick edits would really polish this off-
  • Formatting:
    • Use the spoiler feature to block off the likes and dislikes as this is not a required section.
    • Do not use spoiler feature on Life Story, because that is required.
  • Vindictive is not really a weakness, it is more of a personality treat. There is nothing inherently about seeking vengence that makes you weaker. If being vindictive caused you to be reckless then maybe- but not vindictive, itself.
  • Modest is also more of a personality trait than a strength. This dictates how he might behave in certain scenarios, but does not really strengthen him in a particular way.
  • Life Story:
    • Yours is among the best written I've seen, but unfortunately the word limit is 900, yours is 1025. Try to find some place to trim a bit so it matches the character limit.
    • I don't quite catch the setting- is this all in Regalia? If not specify where in the world his life events happened and then a brief explanation how your character came to be in Regalia.
 
- 'Vindictive' moved to personality traits, spoiler moved from life story to likes/dislikes.
- Will work on figuring out a new strength before removing 'Modest'
- Looking through the life story to maybe trim some stuff and make more clear where everything takes place.

ty for your peer review<3
 
Let's get riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight into the review!
#ReviewAlert
  • Hypermobility has an upside to it in that it allows him to have higher flexibility than your average joe. This means it's more of a strength than a weakness and should be replaced with a different weakness.
  • Being almost unmatched in his swordsmanship while only being 20 seems incredibly powergamey. Please change this to say he is proficient in the art but not unbeatable.
  • Unless Nicolo is the son of an approved high noble character, then it's impossible to be the son of a lord. The highest status you can be without having to apply for high nobility is a baron, so I recommend you downsize Nicolo's father to a baronial status.
  • I can see no other problems with the application. I fairly enjoyed reading through the life story, great job on writing it.
Make the edits in red and tag me when you're done.
 
@Aespair
Made a minor edit to Nicolo's weight to reflect that he's a gymnast and relatively well-built
Might add his injuries sustained since this was made as well at some point
 
Planning some changes that might warrant a re-review, should be up either tonight or tomorrow night (GMT)

@Aespair
 
This is a week late but I've made the changes and am retagging you xo @Aespair

Also tagging @Forum could I get the comment section tidied up?
 
@Aespair

Special permission for Nico now with the Turall release, I don't know if another weakness is necessary so I left it.
 
Added skill information in lieu with the new update on permissions regarding magic and combat.

@Aespair
 
Edits made:
-Bumped Nico from 21 to 27 because I missed that he had to have 15 years of experience.
-Changed some minor physical appearance stuff to comply with his age.
-Made some life story changes to reflect recent events.

All edits made in red

@Aespair
 
Last edited:
@Aespair Major changes made and fit to the new layout, requesting re-review.
 
Don't forget to change the tag to 'Needs Reviewer'!
 
Remove mention of his skill with a glaive until a glaive school is released.
 
@Aespair

Very big edits again, I didn't bother putting things in red because the change effects all the sections.
 
If he was born in the Archipelago and is of Dressolini decent, how is he New Ceardian? Just remove that from the race line and it should be good for approval.
 
If he was born in the Archipelago and is of Dressolini decent, how is he New Ceardian? Just remove that from the race line and it should be good for approval.

With this re-write was born and raised in Gallovia which follows the New Ceardian culture? - but his troupe moved from Montania. I could replace New Ceardian with Gallovian if you'd prefer.
 
With this re-write was born and raised in Gallovia which follows the New Ceardian culture? - but his troupe moved from Montania. I could replace New Ceardian with Gallovian if you'd prefer.
Do that. New Ceardian either means the culture or from New Ceardia, but since the troupe was Dressolini and he was raised and born in the troupe, he would also be Dressolini, though Gallovian by geography. Its like if my parents were German, moved to the US, and then gave birth to me, I would be culturally German, but American by reason of my geographical birthplace.
 
@Aespair

Could you reject this? I need the permission for something else and this character is so inactive it hurts