Hello my friend! I'm here to do a really bad peer review! Let's go! Overall While the images and dividers are pretty they are also space consuming and clutter the page a bit. Possibly make the dividers smaller or lessen how many you use! Full name Does Marie have a middle name? Paragraphs Add a few sentences to your fourth paragraph. Currently it's just over two, which, isn't much of a paragraph. Talents/Strengths School of Medicine- Add a sentence or two to this, as you're just hitting two sentences, one of which talks about another strength! School of Alchemy-Add another sentence or two to this as-well. Along with this how does she use this as a strength? As it stands it simply says she can use Alchemy, not how it's a strength to her. Weaknesses Low muscle tone- There use to be a page that discussed "cop-out weaknesses", meaning weaknesses that mean nothing and were simply used as fillers. A lack of something(i.e lack of combat training, muscle, etc) was considered a cop-out. Though, with recent apps this weakness has been accepted. I'll leave that to your, and your reviewers discretion. Also add one-two sentences. Curiosity- Add one sentence. Things such as this are simply used as instructional prompts for the player making an app. No need to include them in the finished piece. Life story! Why was Marie sent away from her family at only 5 years old? I would suggest adding the year along with her age to help lore-staff follow along better. Over-all this app was great and a lot of my things were just knit-picky! Best of luck getting approved!
@mochalattes ☼ Staff Review! ☼ Hello, my name is Eccetra and I’ll be reviewing your app today. A small confliction! From the first personality paragraph, Marie doesn't seem to have social anxiety at all; far from it in fact. If her confidence is only a facade, please state this! - Please add at least 1 or 2 more sentences to both talents! For example, where was she schooled? How long has she practiced Medicine and Alchemy? How does it aid her in daily life? - Did anything else happen in Marie's life? Did she receive basic reading/writing lessons as a child or have any jobs? Please mark your changes in green and tag me when you’re finished!
@Eccetra OOF, yeah. I'm just finishing a few things up on it and having a few peers review it before I post it, apologies for the wait, some things had came up and it just dun' goofed the timing!
Redone due to recent system changes. Though still v confused about the whole thing. aa. Retagging! @Eccetra
@Jonificus Sorry for the huge wait! The character is.. Much much more redone. Spoiler: EDIT LOG EDIT LOG <AUG 2, 2018 10:35PM> - Life Story changed. - Personality paragraphs changed. - New aesthetics. - Basic Information changed. - Proficiency changed. - Relationships added. ~
Spoiler: Changelog ~ Proficiency points updated to fit the new system. ~ Added +4 onto the original +10 for magical knowledge. :) Bless @Aresi for being a great teacher. It’s that time again! @Jonificus
