Preserved Sheet Leon Vasci

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HeyitsNano

HeyitsNano

The Messiah
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Leon Vasci


Bodmer_Crow_scout_A.webp
"I've seen it all. I've lost it all, gained it all, and then lost it all again. I know how life works and know how to cut across the edges now. I'm a closed book."​
Basic Information (Required)
Full Name: Leon Vasci
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Race: Ithanian Raised Altalar
Sexuality: Straight
Choice of Weapon: Longsword
Main Ambition: Defiance of Strength

Skill Information
Proficiencies
Total Points: Age is 34
34 Points to be used​
  • +11 Athletics (+11 Points)
  • +8 Haunt Ritualism (+8 Haunt points)
  • +15 Dextrous Rogue Skill (+15 Points)
Body Stats
6 body fat level
Athletic from personal choice
Low Body Fat

Languages
  • Common (Spoke with many others in common, and was also taught it to become fluent)
  • Ithanian (Spoken by town)
  • Modern Altalar (Spoken by parents)
Special Traits/Spells/Mutations

Werebeast: Scorrico

Crawl the Skins
Crawl the Underworld
Webbing Spray
Chrysal Stasis

Mutation done by Samal:
Monster Chitter: Cho'roq Mutation

Visual Information (Required)
Eye Color: Whitish grey
Hair Color: Brown
Hair Style: Ear length, Unkempt
Skin Color: Tanned Beige
Clothing: Black Coat, with a grayish undershirt. Plain Black Pants, and Black Combat Boots
Height: 6 foot

Personality and Abilities (Required)

Character Alignment: Chaotic Good

Personality Type: The Commander

Religion: Estel (1/10) Irreligious after becoming Werebeast

Life Story (Required)

  • Leon was born to a family, within Ithania in a minuscule town called Wasure. He was born to two Altalar. The father was denominated Edward Vasci, and the mother was designated Sophia Vasci. One year later, Leon got a younger brother, named Jay, who was born to the same parents. His parents, both spoke Daen due to their ancestry.

  • Leon relished to play rough games with the other children, and he played a game where you kicked a bucket at other people in endeavor to knock them over. He was profoundly adept at this game, but felt scarcely sorry if he hurt someone, unlike the other children. They were all tough, and didn't feel any regret for hurting anyone.

  • When Leon was ten, he was enrolled to a local school where he learned rudimental reading and inditing. He spent an abundance of time outside, playing with his friends.

  • When Leon became 16, his parents hired a Bladesman and athletic coach to train him. His parents thought that if he is able to fight, he will be able to handle becoming a soldier for the villiage of Wasure. His uncle was a very proficient fighter and known fighter, and expected Leon to take on his name. Leon was taken to live in a nearby villiage to learn with his mentor. He studied these arts from age 16-22. He remotely played outside during those years, and studied intensely.
  • Once he was 22, he journeyed back home to find that his parents had left permanently for Regalia.

  • He exerted himself strenuously labor and fought for mazuma where he bought passage to Regalia. Once he got to Regalia he was in many gangs, yet he became an ever more proficient adept at finance. To help him with the gangs, Leon used money and loaned money to pay for a tutor, and learn magic.

  • Leon moved in with his uncle and cousin for a while. He lived with them very shortly, only long enough for him to get into real-estate business.

  • He exerted himself strenuously labor until he was 23, and bought a minuscule dormitory where he renovated and sold for a little more than he bought it for.
Leon did this for another 2 years, until he was 25.
  • Soon, Leon had a lot of debt instead of money. So, with all the stress and pain Leon had, he snuck on a boat and went wherever it took him. He thought that he'd be able to protect anyone else from murder by fighting with no source. eon soon met someone named Gor, who distracted him. calmed him down, and reassured him on how to earn money. LeoM returned back to Regalia. Even though Leon regained vigor and more confidence at present time, Leon still dreams of a better future.
  • Present day, Leon was infected by a Werebeast and five days later, became one. This caused him to lose all sorcery abilities.
 

Attachments

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Last edited:
Peer Review.
  1. Why is everything bolded? I suggest that you unbold everything as it makes your application look messy.
  2. Adam doesn't like an Avanthar name to me, but you can leave it.
  3. You should add spaces between the sections, like talents; it'll make your application easier to read.
  4. Add a weakness because you have four talents, or you can just remove one of the talents and leave it at that.
  5. Nano_Kay said:
    Clothing: (Simple style description)
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    What?
  6. Your character sounds like a bit like a mary-sue, especially on the life-story, he just comes back home; ashes are everywhere and don't seem to be affected by this at all; sure he was sad. I'd expect someone to get PTSD from a place that they grew up in and suddenly is in ashes? Your character sounds like a movie, seeming to find redemption for whoever has burned your city.
  7. How does your family member have an estate? Especially if it's an Avanthar who goes into the slums, I don't expect any Avanthar to really own an Estate in Regalia.
Make these changes and I may post another peer review!
 
Imperialistic said:
Peer Review.
  1. Why is everything bolded? I suggest that you unbold everything as it makes your application look messy.
  2. Adam doesn't like an Avanthar name to me, but you can leave it.
  3. You should add spaces between the sections, like talents; it'll make your application easier to read.
  4. Add a weakness because you have four talents, or you can just remove one of the talents and leave it at that.

  5. What?
  6. Your character sounds like a bit like a mary-sue, especially on the life-story, he just comes back home; ashes are everywhere and don't seem to be affected by this at all; sure he was sad. I'd expect someone to get PTSD from a place that they grew up in and suddenly is in ashes? Your character sounds like a movie, seeming to find redemption for whoever has burned your city.
  7. How does your family member have an estate? Especially if it's an Avanthar who goes into the slums, I don't expect any Avanthar to really own an Estate in Regalia.
Make these changes and I may post another peer review!
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Thank you for your wonderful peer review of my post. You are so kind and helpful. I just got to my computer, so you may see many changes in design. I was using my phone during the beginning.
 
Review
  • Where did he get the Varran implant? It is not mentioned anywhere on the sheet, please include it in the life story.
  • Why did his parents choose to teach him Turall? Some implication in the life story why they were motivated to do this would help. Was it meant for him to become a soldier? Was there a need for him to learn such a complicated combat school? Just an explanation why the school was taught to him.
  • For the Personality and Abilities section, I want you to expand on how the deaths of so many close to him has impacted him. You vaguely mention that he is plagued by their memories, but to what degree? Does he dream about them at night and feel empty? Does he feel guilt at not being able to do something to save them? Just some expansion on the impact of these losses.
Make the above changes and tag myself once completed @Nano_Kay
 
Wumpatron said:
Review
  • Where did he get the Varran implant? It is not mentioned anywhere on the sheet, please include it in the life story.
  • Why did his parents choose to teach him Turall? Some implication in the life story why they were motivated to do this would help. Was it meant for him to become a soldier? Was there a need for him to learn such a complicated combat school? Just an explanation why the school was taught to him.
  • For the Personality and Abilities section, I want you to expand on how the deaths of so many close to him has impacted him. You vaguely mention that he is plagued by their memories, but to what degree? Does he dream about them at night and feel empty? Does he feel guilt at not being able to do something to save them? Just some expansion on the impact of these losses.
Make the above changes and tag myself once completed @Nano_Kay
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Thanks for my review, I marked the changes in Gold!
 
One thing I missed, you'll have to be Athletic for School of Turall, make that single change and tag myself once completed @Nano_Kay
 
You will need to change your swordplay talent to compensate the drop of Turall, either that or simply remove it. The most you can do with a sword would be to strike. Make the appropriate changes @Nano_Kay
 
I need a re-review due to the changes in the character application! I am all done now and I just need it to be reviewed. Any staff can review it but I'm going to tag Wumpatron just in case!
@Wumpatron
 
It's been a while, and a lot have changes have been made, so I need a new and improved full review on this character. Thanks!
 
@Caelamus Sorry to bother you. I added the Stave combat skill, no need for a re-review but yeah! :)
 
@Caelamus Updated and turned vampire. Please reapprove if everything's ok. :)
 
@Caelamus The approved tag got removed when I added a picture.
 
@Caelamus Name change and made sorcerer.
 
Last edited:
@Caelamus A character named Samal applied Cho'roq mutation to Leon.
--> Under Haunt Ritualism
 
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