Rejected Sheet Jäger Schwarz

Discussion in 'Character Applications' started by Film_Noir, Apr 27, 2017.

  1. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    Basic Information
    • Full Name: Jäger Diedrick Schwarz
    • Age: 36
    • Gender: Male
    • Culture & Race: New Regalian Ailor, Lexxon Lineage
    • Main Ambition: To serve House Black and/or the Regalian Empire.
    Skill Information

    Aged-based Proficiency Points to spend = 5 + 36 = 41.​

    Core Group Proficiencies:
    +10 Light Bow Combat (10 Proficiency Points)
    +10 Dagger Combat (5 Proficiency Points + 5 Ailor Lexxon Lineage Racial Boost)​

    Talent Group Proficiencies:
    +10 Perception Training (10 Proficiency Points)
    +10 Stealth Rogue (10 Proficiency Points)
    +10 Conning Rogue (10 free Talent Points)
    +1 Statecraft Command (1 Proficiency Point)​

    Hobby Group Proficiencies:
    +15 Hunting Art (5 Proficiency Points + 10 free Hobby Points)​

    Body Shape:
    +20 Physical Statistic (+10 from Dagger Combat, +10 from Light Bow Combat)
    Ripped Body Shape
    Low Body Fat​

    Languages:
    Alt-Regalian (Native speaker; the primary language of his parents.)
    Common (Native speaker; commonly spoken as a second language by his parents.)​

    Visual Information
    • Eye Colour: Blue-Grey
    • Hair Colour: Black
    • Hair Style: Slightly curly, about 10cm in length.
    • Skin Colour: Nominally white, tanned due to an outdoors lifestyle.
    • Clothing: A black shirt, and black or brown pants. Sturdy boots, suitable for hunting in a forest. A belt with daggers and hunting knives concealed underneath his shirt. A bow and quiver filled with arrows. Fur cloaks in the winter.
    • Height: 180cm
    • Weapons of Choice: A hunting bow, a dagger, the element of surprise, and information.
    Visual Information Expansion
    • Jäger's face is round. His eyebrows are black and have a small arch. His ears, nose and mouth are well-proportioned with respect to his face. His skin is neither completely smooth nor pocked, carrying the expected grazes, scars and nicks from hunting game in a forest. He has no significant scars worth describing.
    • Jäger's eyes are blue-grey. His normal expression is serious and analytical, and a little bit sceptical.
    • Jäger prefers to be clean-shaven and has black, slightly curly hair, about 10cm long. His habits are to be clean and presentable when in the city.
    • He has no facial accessories.
    Personality and Abilities
    • Alignment: Neutral Good
    • Personality Type: Architect (INTJ)
    • Religion: Unionism (strength of belief = 8/10)
    Personality and Abilities Expansion

    How Jäger is perceived by others: Jäger is reserved and usually seems to have a serious demeanour about him. People would find Jäger to be analytical, pragmatic and to have a slight sceptical manner to his personality.​

    How Jäger feels inside: Jäger is a quietly confident, independent individual, not afraid to assert himself. He has his weaknesses and insecurities though. These insecurities often centre around subject matters that he has little knowledge of yet; for example, magic. He does not know how to cast magic and is aware of his vulnerability. Jäger tends to seek to try to overcome such vulnerabilities by learning from his experiences with the subject matter: i.e., not how to cast magic himself; but rather, about its weaknesses, and how to arm himself the best that he is able to, to defend himself against it, in the future. Jäger also has a stubborn, brooding streak.​

    How Jäger acts towards friends and family: When Jäger is around people that he is familiar with and likes, he can open up slightly more, smile more, and exhibit less cynicism and more optimism. Jäger tends to keep a few true friends as opposed to keeping many not-so-close friends. Jäger is warm and very loyal to his immediate family, the bond between Jäger and his siblings being particularly strong.​

    On Jäger's morality: Morally, Jäger is good. He does not like to see unnecessary cruelty and suffering. He is loyal to those who he loves. Jäger is also pragmatic and capable of making hard decisions based on necessity and the bigger picture. He is capable of lying and deceit, for example, if the greater goal is to protect House Black and/or the Regalian Empire.​

    On Jäger's worldview: Jäger is a Unionist, but is not a religious zealot. Jäger respects the order of things in relation to the Regalian Empire's hierarchy; but moreso, Jäger is respectful of people, and believes that everyone has their place and purpose.​

    Life Story

    Prelude: During and following the Drachenwald Crisis, the Schwarz family had retreated deeper into the Drachenwald forest, to their present village, in order to publically live as commoners, appearing to distance themselves from the politics and violence of the region. All the while, members of the family were secretly working (i.e., spying) for House Black.

    Childhood: Jäger is born in a small village, deep in the Drachenwald forest, to Bern and Adelle Schwarz. He has an older brother, Hahn, and a younger sister, Gisela. The three siblings share a close bond. The family is known for their hunting abilities, adept at obtaining forest products such as pheasant, rabbit and boar meat, bear pelts, and wild berries. Along with his siblings, Jäger learns the arts of his family's public livelihood from a young age; namely, how to skilfully hunt forest game.

    Adolescence: Hahn expresses a desire to become a Viridian and shows promise. The Schwarz family is a cadet branch of the House Black. The House Black therefore agrees to pay for Hahn's tuition. Jäger also begins taking occasional trips to the Crown Isle to visit his older brother when Hahn has days off from his Viridian training. Jäger is initially sceptical of the city, preferring the peace of the Drachenwald forest. Nonetheless, he is determined to look out for his idealistic older brother, Jäger being the more cynical of the pair and dubious as to whether the Crown Isle and the Viridians can meet Hahn's expectations.

    Young Adulthood: As the siblings grow however, Hahn's talk of there being a bigger, wider world out there, and his idealistic fondness for the noble houses and the Regalian Empire, eventually rub off on Jäger. Even though protective of Hahn, Jäger begins to cultivate his own interest in the politics and other goings-on of the Regalian Empire and beyond. Jäger quietly reaches out to an uncle who he suspects worked for the House Black as an informant, and thus begins his studies in developing his perception skills and honing his tracking and trapping abilities under his uncle's tutelage. Eventually, his uncle deems Jäger's education complete. Christopher Black organises for Jäger to travel to the city to find work under the employment of the Black Hand's Principal Secretary, Nadina Haaven.

    Now: Following a number of iterations of the Black Hand under various Principal Secretaries, the organisation has since become defunct. Jäger currently works to aid his relatives in the House Black; and to lend a hand to the Empire, in general, whenever he can, as he waits for a new Black Hand (or similar opportunity within the Empire) to rise.
     
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    #1 Film_Noir, Apr 27, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2020
  2. Valentinian

    Valentinian Have a little faith.

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  3. Valentinian

    Valentinian Have a little faith.

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    Here's my review -
    • Personality and Abilities:
      • I'd like for you to add something to the first paragraph that is beyond his interactions with strangers. While this could be considered covered by the third paragraph, being friends and family, I'd like to you to touch on it briefly regardless.
      • The third paragraph lacks distinction between friends and family, instead grouping them as one in the same.
    Otherwise, a very well done character sheet. Mark these changes in red and tag me when you're done.
     
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  4. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    Hi @Valentinian, I reworded the first and third paragraphs so that the distinctions are hopefully more clear (marked in red).
     
  5. Valentinian

    Valentinian Have a little faith.

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    Approved.
     
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  6. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    @Staff Roleplay Requesting a re-review. Added the new Discipline of Subterfuge to Jäger's skills and other minor edits revolving around this. Changes marked in blue.
     
  7. SupremeCripple

    SupremeCripple Lekku Lover Lore2

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  8. SupremeCripple

    SupremeCripple Lekku Lover Lore2

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  9. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    @SupremeCripple Proficiencies added and minor changes made to the life story to accommodate them. Tossing into re-review.
     
  10. SupremeCripple

    SupremeCripple Lekku Lover Lore2

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  11. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    @SupremeCripple Updated to the new proficiency system and tweaked the life story to accommodate the changes. Needs a re-review.
     
  12. SupremeCripple

    SupremeCripple Lekku Lover Lore2

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    @Film_Noir

    Looks good here. I'd say the only thing you should change is that you have the total proficiency points at 35 but Chris is 36.

    I'm gonna re-approve it because that really doesn't warrant you changing it with my approval. :)

    Sorry for the wait. Seriously.
     
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  13. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    Aged Jäger up one year, based on his yearly birthday, and added +15 in total for the new Ailor Race Boost. No need for a re-review.
     
  14. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    Updated proficiency points based on the new system. Needs a re-review.
     
  15. AlphaInsomnia

    AlphaInsomnia Inexplicable Explicative Staff Member Roleplay Staff

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    Well well well, long time no see.

    Claimed for review.
     
  16. AlphaInsomnia

    AlphaInsomnia Inexplicable Explicative Staff Member Roleplay Staff

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    Beyond your 'New' section of the background being a little outdated, I can't spot anything out of the ordinary. So...

    Approved.
     
  17. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    Tossing into re-review because it's been awhile. I've combed through it and updated the points.
     
  18. FireFan96

    FireFan96 Imperial Bloodhound Staff Member Lore2
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    Why not, claimed
     
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  19. FireFan96

    FireFan96 Imperial Bloodhound Staff Member Lore2
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    @Film_Noir here we go:
    • All I will say is that Jäger was born in the aftermath of the Drachenwald Crisis, which was not the tranquil peace that would be conveyed in adolescence. While the average joe was able to just do their job, the inter house rivalries surely caused needless strife for locals in their trades. Address the post-crisis living conditions and how he dealt with them.
    When you have made this change, please tag me
     
  20. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    @FireFan96 Added a Prelude paragraph to the life story to relate the Schwarz experience of the Drachenwald Crisis. (Also, happy birthday!)
     
  21. FireFan96

    FireFan96 Imperial Bloodhound Staff Member Lore2
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  22. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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    @FireFan96 Tossing it into re-review due to the Proficiency System overhaul.
     
  23. FireFan96

    FireFan96 Imperial Bloodhound Staff Member Lore2
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    Remove the Black Order mentions. You can keep Black Hand since you were a member, but Black Order is a no go. @Film_Noir
     
  24. Film_Noir

    Film_Noir Snowdonian Pirate

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