Is This The End?

Aronne had no reason in particular for wandering through the park that evening. It was simply a perfect springtime night, from how the setting sun caught the edges of leaves in spiraling orange patterns, the way the light reflected in glistening beams across the surface of the pond, and how the light breeze carried the heat away, bringing his worries along with it. He knew this almost surreal display of color would make an incredible painting, as he etched the details into his mind, but the process was interrupted by an odd noise on the path behind him. Aronne moved his head back, tracking immediately to the source of the sound, and his eyes settled on something truly horrible. Some form of Allar, he recognized easily, but its flesh was an odd color, and most of all it wore an ominous iron mask over its face. By simple muscle memory, Aronne's right hand found the hilt of his sword, as he forced his voice out of him. "Remove your mask."

The creature made no acknowledgement toward Aronne, but simply titled its masked head to the side, before grunting out a single syllable. "Friend?" It drew closer, as Aronne's gaze moved down to the war pick at its side, and he shook his head. "Not another step." The Necrolith raises his war pick and moved forward with thoroughly shocking speed, and though Aronne did his best to block, the larger weapon simply batted his blade aside, clattering loudly on the cobble.

The shock stopped him in his tracks as the war pick returned, the blunt end striking Aronne's right thigh with a resounding and sickening crack, as he was forced to shift his weight to avoid falling. The war pick returned with the blade, and Aronne moved back, but still the blade found an impact, a sickening wet crunch resounding as it entered his side. He could do nothing but collapse, though he was able to recover his blade after hitting the ground. The Sa-Allar then added in a questioning grunt, "Zurrender?" as it reached its hand for Aronne, but the hand was stopped by a blade as it was hacked off and hit the cobble alongside Aronne with a 'splat'. The Allar howled in pain through his mask, an untamable rage surging within him, as he yet again knocked the blade away from a significantly weakened Aronne, before the hammer end of the pick came crashing down onto Aronne's chest. A hollow wheeze came from his mouth as the air left him and two of his ribs were snapped. Unable to stop it now, Aronne came to a cold realization - I'm going to die. The Necrolith brought his heel into Aronne's face once, twice, three times, as his hold on consciousness began to slip. He rolled onto his stomach, all but screaming at the pain in his chest, and reached for his sword, when the blade of the war pick struck his shoulder, and Aronne felt the Void pulling him in.

His own shallow breaths were echoing and reverberating throughout his skull, as the wet warmth of his own blood and the sheer pain were the only things he felt, but then another sensation came to him. Water, cold running water, surrounding him as the distant noise of a fountain chimed in. The near-death mental vacancy that he's felt only once before now returned, as he began to hear whispering. He could hear all of their voices now, calling out for him and hearing no answer, no matter how badly he wished he could reply. Adrienne. Carlotta. Marco. Silyoran. Lazaruz. Jamie. Elise. Athalia. Katrina. A swirling noise came to him after what could have been seconds or hours, a voice more distinct than the echoes, more real. He recognized Garth's Northerne accent through the distorted and slurred spiraling noises that accompanied his descent into the dark. He had one more thought that he managed to conjure before he fell. How can it end like this?, he wondered as he slipped away, never thinking he'd see the light again.


((OOC: Thanks for reading! Back to closer to my usual style. Tag list in no particular order - @RedSentinel @Nudibronch @Gabauchi @Friendly_Gal @Spectriel @Puagrace @AtticCat @Metallum_ @Daekon @KiddingAround @ZiggyStarDusted @Ghirko @Ellimairy @Rosemberry @SpoopMelon @Fluffy_Rose_9 @IriCrescent @Smiffs @Emo_Bunny @BeashSlap))
 
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Splendid writing!

also I'm sorry I never finished that RP I love aronne I swear
 
How you remembered everything I did and said word for word astounds me.

Great story! I enjoyed reading it a lot!
 
good story jack! for future stories though, you might want to try shaking things up as far as sentence structure goes; those run-on's could use some breaking up. keep the reader on their toes. keep up the good stuff coming!
 
He knew this almost surreal would make an incredible painting
I've never seen "surreal" used this way and don't think it's correct, I could be wrong though. Wouldn't it be "He knew this almost surreal moment would make an incredible painting. (?) Let me know if I am wrong on this please https://www.google.com/search?q=sur...rome..69i57.3743j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8


and Aronne felt the Void pulling him in.
You could've used a - thing here if you wanted, "- and Aronne felt the Void pulling him in." That is completely optional as far as I know though.

I think there were other cases where you could've used a "-" but don't see them now on the second read.
Awesome story, makes me sad I havn't rped with Aronne more.
 
I've never seen "surreal" used this way and don't think it's correct, I could be wrong though. Wouldn't it be "He knew this almost surreal moment would make an incredible painting. (?) Let me know if I am wrong on this please https://www.google.com/search?q=sur...rome..69i57.3743j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8



You could've used a - thing here if you wanted, "- and Aronne felt the Void pulling him in." That is completely optional as far as I know though.

I think there were other cases where you could've used a "-" but don't see them now on the second read.
Awesome story, makes me sad I havn't rped with Aronne more.
He's alive. Barely. As for the first bit, I just missed a word after surreal whoops xD and for the second yeah, gab said something similar about the run-ons.
 
A courier was sent to deliver a series of gifts to Aronne, a nice bottle of Brandy, scotch, and Loiree. As well as a cologne that smelled like Cinnamon. A note was strung along with these that said;
"Get Well soon,"
Deo dei Termini
 
((Wonderful story Jack! Especially the first paragraph and last paragraphs! You did a wonderful job in grabbing the readers attention with imagery and kept the story short enough not to intimidate readers!))
 
A letter arrived at the infirmary Aronne was resting at.

From the desk of the d'Vaud offices.

" My condolences to hear of your injuries, from none other than Silyoran. Spirit Willing, you'll have a speedy recovery and I trust the Alchimia to be able to provide adequate care to see you through. All will atone in the Everwatch and who that had wronged you will find their end with justice"

General Hamelin d'Vaud