Alak'aer walked from the park to the tavern, then back to the park, then to the tavern. Pacing in wide, open circles, thinking so hard that his face showed visible strain. Park, tavern, park, tavern. He fought with himself furiously, forbidding his head to turn in the one direction he had promised he wouldn't go. Looking upwards now, finding a clock: nearly midday, almost time for the boats to depart. He stared at the ground now, as hard as he could. Then walked to the park and sat down on a bench. Scowling, tapping his fingers, fighting the urge.
"I told her I wouldn't go. I told myself I wouldn't go. I can't go back to the Spirit-damned North."
Getting up off of the bench now, he walked towards the docks. Birds chirped as he passed through the park, Alak admiring despite himself the beauty of nature and the quiet community of animals and life within this part of Regalia. Turning down the street, he passed a square full of merchants, peddling their wares, whistling, arranging their goods. A snatch of song or instrument down a quaint alleyway. He hated to admit it, but he loved this city. He loved its contradictions, its people, its energy. Above all, he loved the sense of security it gave him.
Unfortunately, he loved the North just as much. And up there in the cold were the answers he wanted, the feeling of knowing that he had been missing his whole adult life. Jorrhildr and its wilds, Ellador and its solitude. His whole childhood was a mystery. His parents were a distant memory. He had nothing there, no home, no wealth, no friends. Every time he went, he risked his life, his freedom, and his sanity. It was no place for a yanar, much less one who was alone and without decent weapons. So, why, he wondered to himself, why did he feel like he must go?
He walked into the Harbour, scanning each each dock for the blue-and-white flagged ship that came every month, his ticket to the North. It was busy today, the cursing and frenzied movement at a fever pitch. Ropes hung from every available surface, and the smell of alcohol was strong even at noon. Shading his eyes with his hand, he walked the length of the wooden dock until he found what he was looking for. He stepped onto the pier and reached for his change. He hesitated as his thoughts rebelliously went to Rai'ilia.
"I love you too much to scare you again, Rai. I-I can't..." he whispered to himself, frozen in indecision. She was the reason he was still here. His friend, his savior, his beacon. When he came back from the latest trip, she had been so upset. After telling her that he wouldn't go again, he had been perfectly content. Until the boat came. He waited. He screwed up his face in an attempt to puzzle out his feelings, where he belonged, who he belonged to, who he wanted to be.
The horn blew, the sailors shouted. The boat lifted off without Alak on it.
He walked home, feeling proud of himself for a moment. He thought of his fiancee, and his park, and his city. He was glad he was here, even if it meant not knowing a few things. As he stepped into the tavern for a tea and some rolls, he resolved it would be the last time. The last month.
He knew just as well that when it rolled around next, that boat would sicken him again like it had ever since he decided to stay.
~~~
@Emkaloua
A little story to help me practice my writing skills. And a little insight as to the reason Alak disappears so often, and why. Please don't be afraid to criticize, judge, rate, all that. It helps, all of it! Enjoy
"I told her I wouldn't go. I told myself I wouldn't go. I can't go back to the Spirit-damned North."
Getting up off of the bench now, he walked towards the docks. Birds chirped as he passed through the park, Alak admiring despite himself the beauty of nature and the quiet community of animals and life within this part of Regalia. Turning down the street, he passed a square full of merchants, peddling their wares, whistling, arranging their goods. A snatch of song or instrument down a quaint alleyway. He hated to admit it, but he loved this city. He loved its contradictions, its people, its energy. Above all, he loved the sense of security it gave him.
Unfortunately, he loved the North just as much. And up there in the cold were the answers he wanted, the feeling of knowing that he had been missing his whole adult life. Jorrhildr and its wilds, Ellador and its solitude. His whole childhood was a mystery. His parents were a distant memory. He had nothing there, no home, no wealth, no friends. Every time he went, he risked his life, his freedom, and his sanity. It was no place for a yanar, much less one who was alone and without decent weapons. So, why, he wondered to himself, why did he feel like he must go?
He walked into the Harbour, scanning each each dock for the blue-and-white flagged ship that came every month, his ticket to the North. It was busy today, the cursing and frenzied movement at a fever pitch. Ropes hung from every available surface, and the smell of alcohol was strong even at noon. Shading his eyes with his hand, he walked the length of the wooden dock until he found what he was looking for. He stepped onto the pier and reached for his change. He hesitated as his thoughts rebelliously went to Rai'ilia.
"I love you too much to scare you again, Rai. I-I can't..." he whispered to himself, frozen in indecision. She was the reason he was still here. His friend, his savior, his beacon. When he came back from the latest trip, she had been so upset. After telling her that he wouldn't go again, he had been perfectly content. Until the boat came. He waited. He screwed up his face in an attempt to puzzle out his feelings, where he belonged, who he belonged to, who he wanted to be.
The horn blew, the sailors shouted. The boat lifted off without Alak on it.
He walked home, feeling proud of himself for a moment. He thought of his fiancee, and his park, and his city. He was glad he was here, even if it meant not knowing a few things. As he stepped into the tavern for a tea and some rolls, he resolved it would be the last time. The last month.
He knew just as well that when it rolled around next, that boat would sicken him again like it had ever since he decided to stay.
~~~
@Emkaloua
A little story to help me practice my writing skills. And a little insight as to the reason Alak disappears so often, and why. Please don't be afraid to criticize, judge, rate, all that. It helps, all of it! Enjoy
