Preserved Sheet Edric Vundal

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TheSilverSpectre

No, I will not do that for a Klondike bar.
Joined
Dec 31, 2013
Messages
149
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523
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Age
23
Location
Not In the bushes by the 7 eleven on your corner
Edric Vundal.jpg
Basic Information

  • Full Name: Edric Reinhardt Vundal
  • Age: 37
  • Gender: Male
  • Sign: Scorpio
  • Race: Alt-Regalian
  • Main Ambition: Power
  • Secondary Ambition: To forget his past
  • Alignment: Neutral Evil

Skill Information

  • School: Viridian - Blackmark
  • Level: Fighter - Warrior
  • Source: Viridian Castle - Mercenary
Visual Information

  • Eye Color: Stormy Grey
  • Hair Color: Salted Black
  • Hair Style: Pony tail
  • Skin Color: Fair
  • Clothing: Jungle Cat Pelt for a mantled cloak, Chain mail up to his elbows with a black woolen surcoat over it. Deep green woolen pants, with charred black boots.
  • Height: 6'3
  • Body Build: Muscular
  • Weapon of Choice: Large shield and Greborian Warhammer. Bardiche.


Personality Traits

  • Greedy - The reason for his expulsion from the Viridian's, and his apart of his drive as a mercenary. In search of gaining gold, silver, and fame, Reinhardt's list of wants is as long as he is tall. Possibly stemming from his childhood, seeing the meager living standard his father held in comparison to the grand nobility and royalty within Regalia. Edric aims to change his family's position, and his past position as a mercenary has already done that somewhat, and he believes it up to him to do that further within Regalia now.

  • Harsh/Ruthless - One part his want for power, a wild ambition, and another part his Blackmark training, Edric dolls out whatever he wants. His feelings towards those he would consider inferior aren't soft, its not an uncommon sight to see him sawing off fingers to get to stuck rings on his dead foes. He respects power, and only power, feeling anger towards the meek.

  • Aching Sadness/Depression - An iron, stormy exterior he has forged around himself his whole life, Edric was born with depression from the get go, it worsening with his recent tragedies. Before his families death, Reinhardt didn't have time to feel sad, fighting and drinking and wenching kept him too busy. He does his best to hide this, feeling weak whenever he dwells on it. This makes him brusque, and numb to the outside world.

  • Ironwilled/Determined - Might have started from his greediness, but that seed has since sprouted into a stonewall mindset. Reinhardt has his heart set on advancing in the world, gaining power, making a name for himself, and will stop at nothing to have that which he wants. This is most commonly seen as mule like stubbornness, which has caused plenty of arguments.

  • Thrill Seeker - In order to forget his sadness and his past tragedies, Reinhardt seeks simple dangers. He feels truly alive on the battle field, slashing and hacking, or in the Imperial Forests, hunting beasts. A many of action, he despises quiet moments for both the boring safety, and his innate fear of his thoughts and memories.

  • Protective- Few really see this in him, but Reinhardt has a soft streak, and will mentally conjure a list of people who always go behind him when there is something bad before him. Trying to hide this, as he doesn't want others to think him weak, but one can see it from the expression on his face or the tone of his voice when he's saying get back. Reinhardt has lost those he loved before, and refuses to do so again.
Strengths

  • The Blackmark - (Combat) - After a short run as a Viridian, Edric was loath (and mostly lazy) to try starting his training entirely over, and because the life of a mercenary agreed with his personality and he had already done most of the strength training needed, he became a Blackmark. Training as the company travelled, he showed a particular affinity to the tower shield, he was content with almost any basic weapon in hand, but he prefered the mighty Greborian Warhammer. A ferocious, fearsome, and powerful fighter, a living rook- the man went on to enjoy smashing his competition. He is currently in his 17th year of practicing the school, although he hasn't quite reached expert yet.

  • Calculating - (Mental) - A veteran of many different battles, he's learned to assess most anything, from a fort to a man, and find a weak point. While he might seem a dumb brute, he's a capable strategist, both on and off the battlefield, and though his wit isn't quick, he's not incapable verbally.

  • Steadfast - (Emotional) - Just as he is a stone wall physically, Edric has instilled a strong will in himself over the years. This is born from standing in the shield wall, and not balking at the enemy, along with his Blackmark training. Refusing to break unless death is certain, this creates a strong personality. He'll break before he bends, refusing to allow others to control him.
Weaknesses

  • Ol' Halfhand - (Physical/Combat) - One blow, one cut that through a stone in the gears of the well oiled war machine that is Reinhardt Vundal. Ruining any form of higher dexterity in his right hand, forcing him to fight with his left and strap his shield to his right. He considers it an embarrassment to, feeling it makes him look weak, and will grow agitated and hostile whenever it's brought up. Reinhardt is missing both his ring and pinky finger, and a part of the hand beneath where those fingers used to rest.

  • Greed - (Mental/Social) - This is what turns many off to the man, some find it disgusting the lengths he would go to in order to gain coin. Not averse to mutilating a dead foeman to get his chain mail, for instance. His desire for power and riches is his drive, and has landed him in trouble as often as it has let him gain.

  • Hazardous - (Combat) - Especially when he's angry, the Blackmark will swing first, ask questions never, and can sometimes fail to see the bigger picture. Not uncommon for him to get worked up into a red haze akin to a Berhednar, he's been seen to accidentally hack at a friend when he deems them in the way. He could also lose his focus quite easily, becoming reliant on his shield and armor to keep him from harm. Parries are not his thing, and is a sitting duck without his shield as dodging is not apart of his vocabulary.

  • Closed off - (Social) - He doesn't like to be seen as human, or soft and weak as Edric would say it. Originally starting because of his humiliation at the hands of the Viridians, its grown over the years as he has recognized his depression. The final tip off was the death of his family, Reinhardt would place himself within a mental fort, good luck to any person who might draw him out.
Personality and Abilities
  • When he gets angry, frustrated, or bothered in anyway, he'll begin to grind his teeth together, slowly growing harder and harder. It became such a problem for him, he long ago adopted to carry a small flap of leather that he sticks in his mouth to grind and chew on to avoid ruining his teeth.

  • With his lack of a two fingers on his right hand, the Blackmark has made it a hobby of trying to find as many things he can do one handed as well as others might with two. He can juggle with his left hand, catch easier with it, and can write with it. He was born right handed, but his handicap has made him strive for a sort of ambidexterity, although he can only do so much with his right anyhow.

  • While far from a bard, Edric's thunderous and rich voice has gifted him with a decent skill in singing- although only in the deeper and rumbling or loud and booming style of music, like sea shanties and grave boleros
Likes

  • Appropriate Violence- Needless or ill timed brawls, such as random tavern encounters are not Edric's taste. However, when a good excuse comes up, the man loves to cut loose. Especially when whoever he's dishing it out to deserves it, one might observe him laughing along with slamming and smashing.
Dislikes

  • White Knights- While he originally aspired to be one of the knightly paragons, Edric soon found the morals and restrictions to be more binding than he could handle. After receiving a whipping, followed by his expulsion from the order, the man grew to hate these men. He holds that the ends justify the means, and that the Viridian standard just puts hobbles on those who could do more good.
Life Story

  • 268 AC- Born to the Altgrave Triwyn Vundal and his wife Evanlyn

  • 282 AC- Sent to the Viridian Castle, with high hopes of becoming a great warrior

  • 285 AC- Achieves Rank of Man-At-Arms, leaning towards the heavier weapons of the order

  • 287 AC- Sent on his first mission alongside his fellow Viridians, but gets caught looting after a minor skirmish. Upon returning to the castle he is whipped and expelled from the order, starting him down the long road of loathing towards the order, and 'goody goody' knights as a whole.

  • 288 AC- Refusing to return home in shame, he effectively ran away. He'd go on to join a mercenary company, drawn in by the awesome, yet terrifying sight, of the core members- who were all clad in black. It was they who he apprenticed himself to, and so began his training.

  • 293 AC- The band goes hunting in the jungles of Daendroc, where Edric slays a Jungle Cat in a rather unqiue way, allowing it to tackle into his tower shield, and laying open its torso with a sweep of a blade. His first time facing true terror unflinchingly, the boy becomes the man.

  • 295 AC- As it came to conflict, the sellswords took to the Ranger Crisis in search of plunder. Siding with the Ailor, naturally, they carved a path through the country side as an independent entity almost. It was during this time that the Blacklmark to a cut to his right hand, removing the last to fingers and a portion of his hand. Reinhardt and company captured plain and wind elves alike, selling them into slavery for gold. Some of the more personal plunder came in a small herd of the Avanthar's horses, the young blackmark taking two mares and two stallions. Along with that, he took two keepsake weapons, a longsword and dagger made of Black Iron. Noting the fragility of the pieces, he opts to make them vanity hangers.

  • 300 AC- Edric has returned home at this point, bringing the plunder with him. Setting about to make life for himself better, he buys a couple more horses with the gold from the conquest, or rather from the all the slaves he sold. All but one, a fierce female Avanthar named Aefthel, who he took for a wife. While an unlikely match as anyone would see it, the relationship started from a mutual appreciation and attraction to strength. His miniature herd up to six now, he figured he had the beginnings of a good future.

  • 304 AC- He was happy, for a time. A three year old girl had softened his heart greatly, she and the less than a year old boy were his world. His world was shattered while he was away, unable to deny the horrible truth of what happened when he came back one day from a hunting trips- the Bone Horrors had came somewhere in between the three days he was gone. A short time surely, but long enough for his family to be slaughtered by the otherworldly abominations.

  • 305 AC- Resigning himself to a bloody year, Reinhardt took to the field as a simple regalian soldier, eager to hack and slash away his misery. When it ended, he returned to his small estate to get his affairs together. Reinhardt's father still lived, but was old and loath to move. Recieving the small title from his old man, he headed to Regalia, desperately searching for a distraction, some small change to forget his grief.





 
Last edited:
Peer Review!

Important things
  • Only nobles get into the school of Viridian, unless you had some sort of extreme amount of money to pay for the tuition. As Edric is not part of any known noble family, I would suggest to either remove this aspect completely or explain how he was able to afford it.

    This would affect your entire application.
Less important things
  • Balance out your personality traits a tad more. There's more negative than positive aspects. I'm sure you can find one more positive trait, as your other traits are already pretty well thought-out.

  • Your first weakness is a little vague. Is he missing a hand? Or just a few fingers? While it is explained in your story, include it there as well for clarity. Just a nitpick.

  • Personality and Abilities
    • When he gets angry, frustrated, or bothered in anyway, he'll begin to grind his teeth together, slowly growing harder and harder. It became such a problem for him, he long ago adopted to carry a small flap of leather that he sticks in his mouth to grind and chew on to avoid ruining his teeth.

    • With his lack of a two fingers on his right hand, the Blackmark has made it a hobby of trying to find as many things he can do one handed as well as others might with two. He can juggle with his left hand, catch easier with it, and can write with it. He was born right handed, but his handicap has made him strive for a sort of ambidexterity, although he can only do so much with his right anyhow.

    • While far from a bard, Edric's thunderous and rich voice has gifted him with a decent skill in singing- although only in the deeper and rumbling or loud and booming style of music, like sea shanties and grave boleros
    Likes
    • Appropriate Violence- Needless or ill timed brawls, such as random tavern encounters are not Edric's taste. However, when a good excuse comes up, the man loves to cut loose. Especially when whoever he's dishing it out to deserves it, one might observe him laughing along with slamming and smashing.
    Dislikes
    • White Knights- While he originally aspired to be one of the knightly paragons, Edric soon found the morals and restrictions to be more binding than he could handle. After receiving a whipping, followed by his expulsion from the order, the man grew to hate these men. He holds that the ends justify the means, and that the Viridian standard just puts hobbles on those who could do more good.
    You can put this all right into a spoiler, as it is unneeded in a complete app.


  • Why would he take an Avanthar for a wife? If she knew his past, she would be repulsed.
 

@Betterer Thank you for reviewing Edric!​
Only nobles get into the school of Viridian, unless you had some sort of extreme amount of money to pay for the tuition. As Edric is not part of any known noble family, I would suggest to either remove this aspect completely or explain how he was able to afford it.
A son to an Altgrave, as mentioned in the first part of the life story. A lesser form of nobility I found on the wiki page.
Balance out your personality traits a tad more. There's more negative than positive aspects. I'm sure you can find one more positive trait, as your other traits are already pretty well thought-out.
This confused me at first, but I think our opinions differ on the positive and negative. I'm unsure which you mean is my fourth negative, but I put the first three as negative and the last three as positives. I'll edit in Red hyphens and Green Plusses to avoid future confusion.
Your first weakness is a little vague. Is he missing a hand? Or just a few fingers? While it is explained in your story, include it there as well for clarity. Just a nitpick.
Clarified in Green!
You can put this all right into a spoiler, as it is unneeded in a complete app.
Fixed!
Why would he take an Avanthar for a wife? If she knew his past, she would be repulsed.
Clarified in lifestory in Green!

Thank you again for taking the time to review my application!​
 
D'aw him and Cecil are half-hand buddies!