Needs Help/Review Doran Vleshmuh

[Recontroopy]

Full Name: Doran Vleshmuh
Heritage / Culture: Dulon Yanar
Age:18
Gender / Pronouns: Male He/ Him
Religion:Evolism
Occult:Lay Priest
Character Occupation: Merchant
Appearance Information: Orange vines around his whole body that resembles a pumpkin
Eye Color: Black
Skin Color: Orange
Hair:None
Height: 5,11
Body Type: Endomorph
Additional Features:
Skill Information:
Hobbies and Talents:Technology Hobby,
Mechanics:Cursing Mechanic
Languages:Common, Nātl
Backstory/Plothooks: Doran is a Yanar who vowed to never be like his ansestors,
He made his whole body in orange vines that resemble a pumpkin,

Combat Proficiencies and Abilities
Attack Stat:
Defense Stat:
[14/14 points spent]
Proficiency Points:
Strength: 0
[Ability Name]
Constitution: 3
[Tank Tremor Pack, Tank Rally Pack, Tank Slam Pack, Tanking Stance]
Intelligence: 7
[Tech Charge Pack, Tech Assimilate, Tech Exchange Pack, Puretek Burn Pack, Puretek Blessing Pack]
Wisdom: 0
[Free pack: Chem Bang Pack, Free pack: Medical Bolster Pack]
Dexterity: 0
[Ability Name]
Faith: 0
[Ability Name]
Magic: 4
[Magic Warp Pack, Magic Curse Pack, Magic Distort Pack, Magic Isolate Pack]

 

[Birdsfoot_Violet]

Heyo, "occult" usually refers to if a character has magic, or an affliction ,or an affinity. Being a priest of a religion does not make someone occult. In Doran's case, his "occult" status would be "mage." This is also where you would list where the magic comes from (god, void, exist, or ordial). Since he's an Evolist Priest, being a Void Mage isn't a bad idea. It also looks like you haven't picked your Attack and Defense Stat. You can choose from the list described on the Proficiency Page. Additionally, you can't take both Tank Point Buy Packs, and Medical Point Buy (Medical Bolster), as they both require Stances, and you can only have one stance. Having puretek is very unusual for this character. Puretek is usually reserved for purist unionist characters who hate most kinds of magic, it is unheard of for an evolist priest to use it. Finally, it's not mandatory, but it usually is nice to give a little more detail on where your character is from, what prompted them to move, and come to regalia.