Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Joseph Marini, Jul 12, 2013.
Granted, but you can only use them as fishing bait.
I wish I wouldn't always have a headache.
Granted, but only because you no longer have a brain so you die.
I wish I remembered to put my wish in the same post.
Ba pog brruma kith yogyuqid
Granted and I make a brief comeback to corrupt it, waisting my rare post and overall creating a bad comment, not expanding to the content of the thread at all, shaming you furthermore and halting the progress of the thread by causing me to neglect to include a wish...
Er, granted I guess??? But whatever you wished/didn't wish got corrupted.
I wish I could afford a set of a Anvos Stormtrooper armor.
Granted but you pay with your first born child
I wish I could play the ukulele
Granted but you only know one song, and that one song is probably the most overused Hawaiin song in existence. Sickening
I wish I could have two shrubberies that that looks nice and isn't too expensive. Then, when you have found the shrubberies, you must place it here, beside me, only slightly higher, so I can get the two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.
Granted, but they require daily human sacrifice in order to live.
I wish Lore Progression posts weren't so long and/or I actually could be bothered to read them.
Granted, but they're all stale and each post is a cheap mass genocide by the Regalians. As a result, the server begins to slip into more racist subtexts, the server gets the attention of activist political groups sparking a mass-media coverage, server reviews drop to -1 stars and the server is subsequently shut down forever and remembered by the greater world as a place for combat erpers and weebs.
I wish I could go back in time to the 18th century.
Granted, but you die of some disease that isn't lethal in the 21st century.
I wish I was always up to date on the important sh*t I always seem to miss
Granted, but you miss your own funeral.
I wish I could be one of those lonely cat ladies so I have all that kitty cats.
Granted, but everyone thinks your weird and your house, due to having around 20+ cats in it, is constantly filled with random litters of kittens in the corner with varying degrees of health, cat droppings, litter spread all across the floor, cat fur, and the smell of urine. Nobody ever comes to visit you again. You lie awake at night, surrounded by 15 cats, wondering to yourself: Am I lonely because I have all these cats? Or do I have all these cats because I am lonely? Which came first, you wonder. You try desperately to remember a time before the cats, but you can remember nothing. Were you lonely? Did you take in the stray cats to feed your hunger for companionship? Or did this start some other way? Did you lose all your friends and family to these cats? Your life is bitter-sweet. On one hand, you have the cats to keep you company when no people will. On the other, these cats are the cause of your loneliness and poor living conditions. Will you ever be normal again? Can you ever be normal again? You could never part with your cats. Not one of them. They are all you have. Ironically, however, they are also all that stands between you and society. Are they a blessing, or a curse? Nobody would ever know once you died. You never associate with anyone outside, anyway. Nobody would know anything had changed. Eventually, the police would come to evict you for not paying your bills, only to find your rotten corpse, surrounded by cats, in a wretched house.
I wish that I was as good at making wishes as I was corruptions.
(So off topic but I'm dying right now)
Granted, but you suck at corruptions and since you'd have the same skill at wishes as corruptions, you'd also suck at wishes.
I wish @Legoclub22 would make an extremely long corruption for this wish.
Granted, but the corruption is simply too long. It takes up the life of Legoclub22 to write the corruption. His entire life spirals into insanity. He never stops writing. His life is the corruption. He refuses to disconnect from his keyboard, lest he stop writing the corruption. After a week, the corruption is roughly 30 paragraphs long. Months go by as Legoclub22 continues to write the endless corruption, being force-fed simply to survive. The corruption is now the length of a large novel, and continues to grow every second. Legoclub22's keyboard is worn down from frantic, constant typing. His fingers are bloody nubs from smashing keys without rest. After a whole year, Legoclub22 is gaunt and emaciated. He struggles to move his deformed hands from the keyboard to the mouse, his weary face showing a slight grin as he attempts to click "Post Reply." It would take him a further day before he could successfully post the possession. As he does, he finds that @Korgex12 's wish has already been answered, and the thread has moved on several more pages before finally dying out. Legoclub22's post is flagged as a Necro, and the thread locked. Legoclub22 spirals into a violent depression, as his life's work has been for nothing, and has been destroyed. Nobody will ever enjoy it. Nobody will ever see it. After breaking a window with his face, receiving several wounds in the process, the bloodied shell of a person fled into the wilderness until he came to find an abandoned shack in the middle of a dense forest. There, he hid from daylight, going out at night to hunt for his prey of small rodents. He'd locate a rodent, and brutally bash it's head in with a stone before dragging it back to his lair to strip the meat from it's bones with his bare teeth. He continues to deteriorate for several more years, until a pair of Hunters stumble upon the old cabin in the woods, and make the mistake of going inside. They are both brutally beaten to death and cannibalized. After several weeks of searching for the two, local Police come across a nest of skeletons from many kinds of animals. Stacked neatly on top are the remains of two Humans, with most of their body eaten down to bone. The search for what sick monster would do this commences, and authorities soon find the cabin. Six more people would die before the creature was slain, from eyes gorged out, to skulls cracked, to throats ripped out. The creature is sent to a Laboratory to be studied, and a cover-up story is concocted. The researchers find that the monster is nothing more than a deformed Human being, tainted by years of self-imposed torture, and riddled with curable ailments. Several people who came into contact with the so-called Woods Man have committed suicide, unable to handle the haunting sights that plague their dreams, or the idea of such a thing existing.
I wish that I could make long corruptions that weren't absolutely horrid and morbid.
Granted, but they're very low quality.
I wish @Legoclub22 could make high quality corruptions that aren't absolutely horrid and morbid.
Granted, but they're short.
I wish I could talk to myself four years ago and offer advice.
Granted, but past-you doesn't follow present-you's advice until for years in the future.
I wish @Legoclub22 could make long high quality corruptions that aren't absolutely horrid and morbid.
Granted. But he doesn't obey the rules of the game. He makes every single wish detailed in the most whimsical outcomes. There is no corruption, only good things coming out of good wishes, and bad wishes becoming godsends. Eventually Korgex's wish had backfired and @Legoclub22 comes to the realization, that there is more to wishes than blankly fulfilling them without a followup. He becomes enlightened and leaves Massive, deeming it unwise to carry on to carry out his new ambition in life. He spends his entire life raoming the world, giving gifts to children, to the poor, to the needy. He becomes a legend, and is elected to become the world's ruler and the world goes into peace, war ceased, everyone is equal. But we shall never see LegoClub, he has left us for a greater purpose. We mourn for we will never see our friend again, for he is out making the world a better place.
I wish this wish wouldn't be corrupted.
Granted. You do realize, though, that nothing is really gonna happen, though, right?
I wish for infinite wishes.
Yes but I didn't hear correctly... So I gave you infinite witches.
I want a sandwich (Following the basic wishes)
Granted, Peanut butter and jelly, with classic yellow mustard.
I for a burger.
Granted, you have a four pound burger which you must finish before you may exit a sitting position in your current place. Your legs are frozen in a sitting position until you eat the entire four pound burger. To make it worse, every forty minutes, the burger returns to it's four pound glory.
I wish I ate lunch every day because why tf don't I eat lunch ever
Granted but you must eat an eight pound burger everyday without any questions asked, you have to. While eating there is a creepy man with a knife behind you at 12:00 sharp to see if you are eating.
I wish I could draw better
Granted, but you can only draw well when using human blood.
I wish I had a working mouse for my computer that was NOT A RODENT
Granted, but the only button is the scroll button.
I wish my stuff of massive came back seriously who took my dang stuff
Granted, but nobody took your stuff, it ran away. You now must deal with the fact that your stuff was brought back to you against it's will, and it isn't happy about it.
I wish for happiness
Granted, but it is only on every leap year!
I wish to be strong.
Granted, but now you are extremely slow and fragile.
I wish you had a wish
Granted... but not in that post.
I wish I could always know where my tablet pen is.
Granted, but it is always beyond your reach. One day, you're aware that it's partying its point of in Vegas, and the next, it's on the edge of a volcano on Mars.
I wish I had more pretzel bagels.
Granted but now you keep losing your tablet.
I wish I could be good at skyrim.
Granted, but they're poisoned.
Granted, but now you don't like Skyrim. Then you get beat to death by a Skyrim super-... I mean Skyrim fan because you don't like Skyrim.
I wish that @Emkaloua and @IndigoIvy didn't corrupt the same wish.
Granted, They didnt for 5 seconds
I wish that i was normal
Granted but now everyone else is weird and it's the new normal to be weird.
I wish I didn't fus ro dah in my bathroom.
Granted, you Yur to shul'd in your bathroom.
I wish I had marginally more muscle and body mass while remaining healthy and not overweight
Granted, but now you're so big that you exploded due to your metabolism not being able to match your volume to surface area ratio and thus causing you to generate too much body heat and combust.
I wish you got the reference that fus ro dah was me vomiting everywhere.
Granted, but now you you wuld nah kest at random times.
I wish I didn't decimate two entire kingdoms out of boredom.