Rejected Sheet Brador Bengaltar

Discussion in 'Character Applications' started by Wolfen_, Apr 1, 2021.

  1. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    Basic Information



    • Full Name: Brador Bengaltar

    • Age: 30

    • Gender: Male

    • Race: Undead (Corpse Type) - Formerly Bolven Ailor

    • Sexuality: Heterosexual

    • Preferred Weapon: Greataxe

    Skill Information

    Total Points | 50

    • 10 Greataxe Combat
    • 10 Unarmed Combat
    • 10 Bola Combat
    Hobby Points |
    • 15 Hunting Art (+10 Hobby Points,+5 Bolven Bonus)
    • 5 Husbandry Art
    • 5 Pathfinding Art
    • 5 Leatherworking Art
    • 5 Construction Art
    Body Shape | 20

    10 Greataxe Combat + 10 Fist Combat = 20




    Languages |

    • Common

    Abilities/Special Traits |

    • Dead Shell I
    • Undead Mend I
    • Rotting Bite I
    • Magic Sight III
    Visual Information

    • Eye Color: Silver with black scleras (Typically gray-blue)

    • Hair Color: Black

    • Hair Style: Swept back and unkempt at lower-back, straightened

    • Skin Color: Paled

    • Clothing: Fluctuates between various mismatched armor and chainmail or darker, more exposed coats

    • Height: 7 feet
    Personality

    Option Two: The Core List

    • Character Alignment
      • Chaotic Neutral | Over several years, Brador’s mentality has begun to sink into an apathetic mindset that nothing matters, and has lost nearly all of his interest in a world he believes he does not have a stake in.
    • Personality Type
      • The Logician (INTP | Introverted, intuitive. Brador often mixes his personal life with nature, having much more of a care for the world itself rather than it’s people who inhabit it.
    • Religion
      • Apatheist, 0/10.
        • In his youth, he did not take to religion like others did, and spent a portion of his life growing into an apathetic view towards gods and deities such as The Spirit, Dragons, etc.

    Life Story

    Born to a family of warriors deep within the Ceardian lands, Brador stood out among his siblings as the frail younger child within a modest home, naturally standing out among the bunch from his early beginnings. Nearly from the start of his life, his father and two older brothers would constantly pester him in his young childhood to train and join them, often displeasing him and causing him to run off. This would go on for quite a long time, and Brador, unlike his siblings and sister, took more interest in horticulture and nature. This caused his family to be overly displeased, and his father out of fear that he would not take interest in embracing tradition and joining a Dearth of some kind, came to the decision to kick him out at the age of fourteen, with the promise that he would be let back in once he had become a proper man.



    This decision, however, backfired somewhat, as Brador ended up taking a liking to nature. Despite the small things like mosquitos, ants, and poisonous vermin, Brador ended up honing his own skills and what he’d learnt from spending time in the town garden. From that point on, for five years, Brador spent the time wandering the continent and calming the rage that dwelled beneath in his heart. Perhaps it was from the fact that he felt uncared for, and somewhat unloved, but he knew that hole had been filled by the creatures he would call friends and family.


    Most of his time outside aside from gathering resources and food would be spent training, surprisingly. He had realized during the years that he would need to be strong to survive, and that would require weaponry greater than bare fists. Considering he rarely went into towns and relied on his own skills to live, he inevitably would go out of his way to begin working in a small town side to make enough to pay for an axe. When it came to armor, however, he thought it would be best to save and see if he could return to his family first.



    When he returned home in his mid twenties, he found that one of his brothers had passed away which had nearly crippled the families self esteem. He was barely welcomed in his return, and his father moreover insulted and threatened his existence, saying that ‘if he had come back sooner, perhaps they would’ve been able to save him’. Though at first Brador was somewhat unphased by this, despite their cold treatment of him in their youth, Brador developed a lingering guilt in response to his brother’s passing, though soon enough was kicked out after ignoring his father’s words and banned from returning home. At this point, he felt the pain that had grown deep underneath his heart begin to unravel itself, whispering a plan to him.



    Within the midst of the night, Brador set out and soaked the garden before lighting one of their sheds on fire as a final sendoff of defiance. Thinking this would be a good sign for the family to awaken to, he disappeared far into the woods to find rest, but was awoken to the area of his family's small village lit ablaze. The trees had caught fire, the houses had nearly completely burnt, and far off in the distance, only on gaining a closer look had he realized his act of rebellious vandalism had caused more destruction than anticipated. Regret had begun to fill him, and in a desperate change of heart he would charge into the roaring flames in hopes to save what little family he had left. This effort proved fruitless to him as he soon realized they had only perished in their efforts to flee the inferno, and soon enough he would succumb to the same blaze that took his loved ones as well. as if this had been the true point of no return to his family, or his soul.


    Be it out of sheer spite or for some reason he could not understand Brador’s time was not yet done. Soon finding himself awake and back from the dead. Resurrected as a Ghül with hardly any recollection to what had brought him there, or much of a complete picture of his life to begin with. Though the guilt he carried never fading, as if this had been the true point of no return to his family, or his soul whether he knew why or not.





    Months later Brador set out on his own once more. Filled with uncertainty and solitude once again, he took the quickest ticket to get out of the continent, and boarded a cargo boat in an attempt to find somewhere new to settle down and get out of his thoughts. While he was out on the deck, the screams of the crew had alerted his attention to the carnage caused by one Maria Ada Vass across the ship, which eventually culminated in an unprovoked fight for survival. After a gruesome scuffle, Maria and Brador resigned and came to what seemed to be relatively equal terms. At first being the reluctant audience toward Maria’s philosophy on life and death, Brador soon found himself drawn more and more to the prospect of finding closure within knowing the circumstances of his revival, as well as atoning for the guilt he carried.



    Though soon enough this alliance would prove fruitless and he would once again find himself alone, though now in search of a glorious purpose in easing his unknown guilt, the vagabond wanders the streets of Regalia hoping to find a sense of closure, or the next thing closest to it.
     
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    #1 Wolfen_, Apr 1, 2021
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2021
  2. Antimreoir

    Antimreoir Refugee

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    Howdy, I'm picking up this application for review. Expect a response soon.
     
  3. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    AYy ty!
     
  4. Antimreoir

    Antimreoir Refugee

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    • Winner Winner x 1
  5. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    @Antimreoir ayy updated profs to fit the rewrite, changes made in red
     
  6. Antimreoir

    Antimreoir Refugee

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  7. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    @Antimreoir AYyy made changes to backstory and abilities to reflect undead permission as well as minor changes to hobby points (swapped out pathfinding for hunting art). Changes made in green!
     
  8. Antimreoir

    Antimreoir Refugee

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    Reapproved!
     
  9. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    Ayy ty!
     
  10. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    bumping for new review
     
  11. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main Staff Member Lore1

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    Hello I will be claiming this for staff review!
     
  12. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main Staff Member Lore1

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    Approved.
     
  13. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    Ayyy hype
     
  14. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main Staff Member Lore1

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    Actually I'm going to slap the character back into review for a moment after deliberation of how stacked the character is. They may not be super ability heavy like some examples but the design of the character does seem very narrow in that it's all mostly CRP and CRP centric alone or tailored around negating some areas of RP like Stealth for example.

    How is this remedied? Bring down Bola to 5, Great axe down to 10, remove perception. Take these points and add them into the hobby category to provide the character with proficiency that contribute more to the actual design and intent of the character. Maybe add in leatherworking so the character can work with pelts they've hunted, construction for building camps. I'm aware of the outdoors theme that Brador has and I feel the actual 'theme' of the character is far too heavily fixated on combat which it shouldn't.
     
  15. Wolfen_

    Wolfen_ studson was here

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    ayy fixed up the point loadout! changes made in I'm running out of songs that start with green you get the idea thanks again! @Caelamus
     
  16. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main Staff Member Lore1

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    Approved.
     

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