Played Character Allestane Vikström

[Yui_Drax]

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Character Information

Name: Allestane Aurelius Tempetyr-Delmotte Vikström

Heritage: Ailor
Culture: Regal

️Age: 27 Years Old
Birthday: April 7th, 285 AC

️️Sex: Male
️Sexuality: Heterosexual
Marital Status: Married

️️Religion: Unionism
Occult: Exist Mage
Occupation: Soldier

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Appearance Information

Eye Color: Dark Turquoise
Skin Color: Chestnut
Hair: Sangria
Height: 6'2" | 1.87 Meters
Body Type: Athletic

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Skill Information

Hobbies and Talents: Athletic Hobby | Magical Talent

Mechanics: Ailor Mechanics I-V

Languages: Common | Breizh | Calem | Canta | Skodje

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Profiencies and Abilities

Attack Stat: 5 | Strength
Defense Stat: 4 | Magic

Proficiency Points: 14/14

Strength: 5
- Technique Parry (x)
- Tangle Strike (x)
- Break Down (x)
- Force Toss (x)
- Gut Punch (x)

Constitution: 2
- Interception (Free) (x)
- Iron Will (x)
- Familiar Disrupt (x)

Intelligence: 1
- Safeguard (x)

Wisdom: 2
- Defend Command (x)
- Resist Command (x)

Dexterity: 0

Faith: 0

Magic: 4
- Wardrobe (Magical Variant) (x)
- Magic Resist (Free) (x)
- Magic Warp (x)
- Magic Summon (x)
- Magic Revive (x)

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Life Story

April 7th, 285 AC - May 4th, 303 AC | Born to a lineage of Aelriggan Knights and Military Officers, Allestane, first of his name, honoring God-Emperor Allestrain, was born. Aspects of warfare and duty were his childhood, discipline and training were his adolescence, and with his adulthood came the time to enroll in the School of Drixon and Drixon Lancer Academy.

June 18th, 303 AC - March 31st, 309 AC | Scarred by war but still living, Allestane's fortitude remains. His merits grew and records drawn until eventual decline into the reserved forces, encroaching the pit of vipers that was the city of Regalia.

April 2nd, 309 AC - Present | Regality in his newfound status and burdens he now bears, his bloodline welcomes into the fold, four. His identity, blue, and his future, bright. With war on the horizon yet again, he holds his blade in his right and his shield in his left before fading into obscurity as the fog of war drowns him and silence fills the air until his eventual resurface.

Plot Hooks

- Allestane is a military man, born and raised. His highest accomplishments are being a graduate of the Kalemburg Ordner Akademie, an instructor at the Imperial Marshal Academy and a General of an Imperial Legion.

- Allestane is a Breizhman of Kintyr, Spellsword and Squire of the Aelriggan Order, and an elementary runic inscriptor or enchanter.

- Allestane is a commonborn but member of aristocracy, a blueblood peerage member of House Vikström.

- Allestane is no fan of politics, he's willing to entertain it but in the end, it's a subject of no positivity.

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[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Hello! Claimed for review, expect a response in due time.

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Unlucky timing on this, you'll have to redo your points due to the new proficiency update.
THAT BEING SAID, everything else looks to check out. I might ask that some details about the prominence of the character in their backstory be dropped down a peg or two, as anything too out of the ordinary would fall under a backstory perm.
Mark changes made in Green, and tag me once you're all set!

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Removed all Titles due to lack of relevance in his now changed life story
- Changed the Preferred Weapons to just some normal weapons rather than those wielded by the roman legions
- Changed Racial Boost from Siege Command to Husbandry Art

Inventory Information
- Removed the roman weapons and changed it accordingly to normal weapons that Volesus would wield
- Also changed the name of the roman dagger to just a normal dagger

Skill Information
- Kept the Core Group the same
- Removed all previous proficiencies in the Talent Group and added Strength Training with ten Age Points being invested
- Kept what remains of the Age Points in the reserve for future roleplay and updated with the new proficiency system

Body Shape
- Recalculated the Body Stat accordingly with the addition of Strength Training
- Changed the Body Shape due to the abilities given from Strength Training and wanted it to be somewhat logical
- Changed the Body Fat accordingly due to Body Shape being Strongman

Special Traits / Abilities
- Added the mandatory abilities from having the sufficient points in Strength Training and also flavor text for them, kinda simple
- Changed the progression mount for Volesus and added the 'Heerstepper' due to him being an Imperial

Life Story
- Changed the entire last portion of his life story to get rid of any mention of the 'Victrix Legio Fulminata' due to the removal of Frontline Command and just made it simple with the connection to Ashen's Villiers Knight

Alrighty, that is all, thanks for looking at this! Edits in Blue! @Ded Jok​

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Looks good, approved!

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Made him into a Stormblade with Ashen's permission
- Added the appropriate Nicknames that I thought he'd be called the most
- Added the appropriate Titles due to life story
- Lowered his Age to comply to the family tree of House Ferrum Tempestas (Stormblade)
- Changed his Preferred Weapon to comply with lore with his new Schooling

Skill Information
- Removed three Age Points from Sword Combat and re-invested two into Spear Combat, bringing both to seven Age Points each
- Took five Unused Age Points from the reserves and and the earlier free Age Point from Sword Combat and invested into Schooling

Body Shape
- Re-calculated the proficiencies that added to Body Stat
- Changed Body Shape and Body Fat to comply with the lore from the School of Drixon page

Languages
- Added d'Ithanie due to his background as a Stormblade
- Added Alt-Regalisch due to his life story as a Drixon, also might contemplate learning Dressolini but not now

Special Traits / Abilities
- Added another pet to further fit into the lore of Drixons having a Calemberger Dobs
- Added the racial abilities of the Brannon Lineage
- Added the Schooling of Drixons and Marshalry

Visual Information
- Changed his Eye Color to Hazel Brown from Light Blue due to a skin change
- Changed his Hair Color to a more darker color due to a skin change
- Changed his Skin Color to a darker color due to a skin change
- Changed his Clothing due to a skin change

Personality
- Changed his religious outlook from 'neutral' to somewhat devout

Life Story
- Changed his life story once more (sorry :3) to comply with the history of House Ferrum Tempestas (Stormblade) and Schoolings added to his prociencies

Alrighty, that is all, thanks for looking at this! And sorry, even though I just changed it last week! The intent of this character was to roleplay more closely with Ashen but the purpose fluctuated a few times until now, hopefully I won't have a need to request a re-review until IC roleplay or something else. Edits in Blue! @Ded Jok​

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Due to Alt-Regalisch not being a parental language, you'll have to spend linguistic points to acquire it.

 

[Yui_Drax]

Edited the appropriate changes and thought to add Dressalo due to Volesus spending time in Lampeport for three years as he attended the School of Marshalry's Discipline of Artillery Command. Used six unused Age Points for Linguistics. Edits in Blue still. @Ded Jok​

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Looks good, reapproved!

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Changed one of the Nicknames from 'Vol' to 'Volley' due to an IC interaction
- Changed and added many Titles due to the Life Story and roleplay, some were striked out to follow lore
- Edited the Preferred Weapon by removing the Calvary Lance and replaced it with Kite Shield
- Edited the Racial Boost to be Shielding Combat from Husbandry Art

Inventory Information
- In the first spoiler, I changed the 'Javelins' that he had to 'Pilums' just for flavor text
- In the second spoiler, I moved two weapons that would normally be 'hidden away' and added it to his person due to Volesus obtaining a Weapon Permit in roleplay
- Also changed the amount of Regals Volesus carried from forty to just twenty

Skill Information
- Used all points from the reserves and as such, there are now zero in Allocation
- Added five Age Points into Sword Combat to a total of twelve from the initial seven
- Removed two points from Spear Combat bringing it down to five from its initial seven
- Added four Age Points into Heavy Ranged Combat so that Pilums will be plausible in roleplay ; and if you're counting, yes, he is one Age Point over the limit to which I will address in the next few moment
- Added three Age Points and five Racial Points into Shielding Combat to bring it to a total of sixteen points ; he is now four points over the limit, the reasoning will be in the next note
- Removed Strength Training due to the proficiency itself being rendered useless with the Abilities being part of the Brannon Lineage already and his Body Stat being maxed already ; referring to the last few notes, the 'debt' is now paid and there is six points unspent
- Reduced Husbandry Art due to the Racial Boost being Shielding Combat now
- Invested all six unspent Age Points into Sorcery, specifically Elementary Control VI (6) and Element Brand III (3)

Body Shape
- Re-calculated the Body Stat from its initial thirty-two (32) to the now thirty-five (35), specifics are above

Special Traits / Abilities
- Added the Sorcery information and named / filled it with flavor text

Personality
- Re-wrote his Religion section for a mix of Evintarian and Vultarian Churches so that I can make him a somewhat pious and more militaristic character

Life Story
- Added lots of details, I'm not even kidding, I made him involve in nearly all the wars in the last few years and although he's only twenty-two currently, I made it more logical as he started being a soldier when he had sufficient training ; which means, right after he became a Drixon cavalryman, and when he was sixteen years old which is considered an adult more or less. Anyways, all new information of his involvement in wars are all in spoilers, no exception with what information that isn't in spoilers are highlighted in purple

Alrighty, that is all gamer! Edits are in Purple! Thank you for looking over this, was a pain to sort and write in details in a way where he was actually there. @Ded Jok​

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Reapproved!

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Info
- Added another part to his Name which I wanted to cue in another connection, specifically in his application so that it may add more onto his aesthetic of being a Breizh
- Changed his Culture due to the re-work on House Stormblade from being Imperial to Breizh
- Also included his change from being a Touched Aberrant to an Aberrant ; Sanguine

Skills and Physical Info
- Crossed out the Sorcery proficiency due to [Cursed Soul I] from the von Kërle's Vampire Base Kit
- Simply tweaked the Body Stat section to include the actual calculation being 37 but then reduced it due to the limit of a Brannon Ailor being 35

Linguistics
- Added Picaron due to the re-work on House Stormblade being from Kintyr but kept d'Ithanie due to relevance of Ithanian in the family
- Also added the dialect to Alt-Regalisch to make it more specific and for the flavor text

Mystical Abilities
- Added a section and various spoilers for the recent infection of Volesus being a von Kërle now, including the Vampire Base Kit, Bloodline Ability Kit, and description of his Vampiric Form
- Crossed out the Sorcery section due to [Cursed Soul I] from the von Kërle's Vampire Base Kit

Physical Appearance
- Edited the Eye Color accordingly due to recent infection and turning into a von Kërle

Personality
- Shortened the previous paragraph on Volesus's POV of Unionism, that was pre-Unionism update, and is now lore compliant and shortened and emphasized on a God Emperor and God Empress

Life Story
- Included recent events from in-character events of being a noble house guard and also the turning into a von Kërle sanguine

Alrighty, that's all, thank you for looking over this and feel free to ping me on whether my current list of abilities are overkill or just overall, unpleasant. Anyways, edits are in Purple, as always, thanks! @DedJok

Post Edit: Forgot to say that I added images and aesthetics to make it look better. ​

 

[DedJok]

@Yui_Drax Reapproved!

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Info
- Edited the Affliction portion of the Race section to replace his status as a Sanguine into a Touched Aberrant now due to him being cured

Linguistics
- Re-labeled the languages to the most recent update
- Removed Ithanian due to the recent Linguistics update since it was one of two parental languages and I have Breizh already

Physical Appearance
- Replaced the Eye Color into Ice Blue from its Crimson Red

Life Story
- Added mention of his person being cured, small but found it suitable to be added due to lack of 'big' events happening to him

Alrighty, that's all gamer! Edits in Purple. Oh, also replaced some images for others that I found more aesthetically pleasing. @DedJok ​

 

[sonofthestars]

I'm taking this application for review. Expect a reply shortly.

 

[sonofthestars]

Core Group

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I'm requesting that you remove one of these combat proficiencies. This particular combination of combat proficiencies is known to be rather min-maxy, whether that was your intention or not, and removing one will significantly re-balance the character. I suggest removing Heavy Ranged.

Fulgur [Sorcery]

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Please specify in your Life Story why this character knows Sorcery. It's a bit odd for a devout Unionist to be comfortable with the Occult, and I'd like for you to explain, even if the abilities are aesthetic. If you'd prefer for the aesthetic to be an intrinsic, non-Sorcery related deal, I suggest you apply for a Non-Ability mutations Special Permission.

Make edits in a separate color and tag me when done.

 

[Yui_Drax]

Min-Max issue

Click to shrink...

Done, removed half of the combat proficiencies listed due to what you said and also the fact that Drixons do not utilize shields like I thought, my mistake on that (or at least, I didn't find it).

Religion Issue

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I wanted a play on words due to his surname being 'Stormblade' and made him learn sorcery from a NPC which is described in a spoiler labelled 'Eastern Wars'. As for the issue with his faith, I honestly don't feel confident of being a pious or even a devout of all of the deities of Unionism and I want to concentrate on a small part so that I can manage it easier. Also wrote about it in the Religion portion of the Personality section, but I would like your opinion if you'd like to give it.

Other point investments occurred due to the removal of some combat proficiencies which freed a lot of points and I decreased investment in Sword Combat, invested in Strength Training, invested in Horticulture Art, invested in Pathfinding Art, and switched the Racial Boost to Husbandry Art so that he could roll with two pets. Also re-calculated the Body Stat due to vast edits in proficiencies. Edits in Pink. @sonofthestars

Post Edit: Highlighted the portions in the 'Eastern Wars' spoiler so that you can see the changes in his personality from a young age rather than now and wrote of the encounter with learning sorcery.​

 

[sonofthestars]

@Yui_Drax Approved.

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Info
- Added the Sex and Eye Color to this section to correspond to the new format

Core Concept
- Moved the Religion portion into here
- Wrote the Character Concept in here

Skills and Physical Info
- Removed Schooling due to it being removed from Proficiencies and am keeping the spare six Age Points for another day

Physical Appearance
- Wrote the required sentences to correspond to the new format

Life Story
- Wrote the bullet points to correspond to the new format

Progression Information
- Added the talents to correspond to the new format

Hallo! Updating this application to correspond to the format, still a bit confused than clear on the rules but if there's anything wrong, ping me of course! Thank you! @sonofthestars​

 

[sonofthestars]

@Yui_Drax Approved. As a side note, if you have two points forced for a Progression Talent, you cannot be forced to allocate the remaining point anywhere else. That point is free for you to place wherever.

 

[Yui_Drax]

Just switched my Sorcerer Talent to General Talent. @sonofthestars

Post Edit: Also forgot that Lineages were removed, I'll edit it later.​

 

[sonofthestars]

Approved. Keep in mind, once this character has appeared in a Progression once, you can't switch his talent any further.

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Changed the Race into the proper variant of Ailor which was Hinterland due to Allestain's culture being Breizh
- Edited the Age due to changes of House Tempetyr's small change in family members and other stuff

Skills and Physical Info
- Used all the six unused Age Points, which will be explained further down
- Increased Strength Training from five Age Points to ten Age Points
- Increased Horticulture Art from two Age Points to five Age Points with the unused Age Points
- Removed Pathfinding Art due to it being removed from proficiencies and freed ten Age Points which explains the recent expenditure of Age Points of Strength Training and Husbandry Art
- Due to the removal of Ailor Lineages many weeks ago, the Racial Boost to Husbandry Art from the now non-existent Brannon Ailor is now null and I've added five Age Points to Husbandry Art to become the maxed fifteen
- Increased Sorcery from six Age Points to nine Age Points, using the last three unused Age Points and also adding the free Sorcery spell from the Ailor Racial Ability, Destined Body I
- Simply re-calculated the additions for the Body Stat as Pathfinding Art was removed and Strength Training had been increased

Mystical Abilities
- Maxed out Strength Training which granted me Gate Smash I on top of Great Force I which I already had due to previously investing five Age Points to it
- Added the three free Ailor Racial Abilities and labelled it appropriately
- Added the new abilities and flavor text for Magic Sight I and Elemental Control III which can also be justified from the Life Story to which I edited, it's highlighted so that it can be located with ease

Life Story
- Some sentences are highlighted due to the most recent change, the explanation and justification of new sorcery abilities learned in Allestane's past ; one of which is located in the spoiler labelled 'Eastern Wars'

Alrighty, thank you for looking at this. This, hopefully, will be the last update for a while unless I jinx it but, no changes to progression talents anyways. Also updated aesthetics. @sonofthestars​

 

[Yurs]

Claimed for review! Expect a reply shortly

 

[Yurs]

App looks great, love the aesthetics!

APPROVED

 

[Yui_Drax]

Mystical Abilities
- Updated the rework of Ailor Racial Abilities ; Ailor Specials

Linguistics
- Added Hinterwälder because, why not, and also because of the Ailor Special, People of Many Tongues

Hallo! Alrighty, just added these few edits due to the rework and adjusted the insignificant words and shtuff in the lifestory to make it make sense. Edits in Purple! @Yurs

Post Edit: Thanks for looking at this! ​

 

[Yurs]

Thanks for the detailed changelog! Everything looks great, feel free to tag me again if you need other reviews.

APPROVED

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Removed Stormblade as part of his nickname as he hasn't been called that for a long time
- Added Alle to his nicknames

Core Concepts
- Added more information for the Religion portion to make it more flavorful to bring relevance to his life story and experiences, not to mention familial influence
- Adjusted his Character as well due to fleshing out how I wanted to roleplay him during these past two months or so as a noble and finding a balance

Mystical Abilities
- Not a major change but I simply added German translations of his pet's names

Linguistics
- Added Öbern and Issisch so that I can in reality access a language pack, but in-character, he's involved in two major Wirtem academies that allowed him many opportunities to learn a lot of Wirtem involved languages
- Also removed Dressolini as a result to accommodate Öbern

Life Story
- Not much that you need to look at as I've only adjusted some information in the spoiled portion, simply adjusted his second academy from the Imperial Regalian Marshal Academy to the Calemberg Ordner School

Alroighty, that is all I wanted lest some update out of nowhere is happening soon and makes me have to come back to edit some shtuff. Thank you for looking at this @Yurs , edits shall be in Porple, as always.​

 

[Yurs]

Everything looks good!

APPROVED

 

[Yui_Drax]

Hallo! Updated to the new template. :3 @Yurs Thank ya for looking at this.​

 

[Acosmism]

Approved

 

[Yui_Drax]

Hallo! Simply updated recent IC developments of House Delmotte and House Nordhjem into his Basic Information and Life Story. @Acosmism Thank ya for looking at this.​

 

[Yurs]

APPROVED

 

[Yui_Drax]

Basic Information
- Removed the 'sub-race' of it all, just whatever category different Ailor were split into. Just simple 'Ailor' now

Proficiencies
- Removed one point from Magic and Charisma before allocating them to Strength and Constitution
- Added two new packs with Strength being five points invested in total
- Added two new packs with Constitution being five points invested in total
- With what was formerly State General Pack and State Commander Pack, now State Leadership Pack, I turned it into the new proficiency pack
- Removed North Linguist Pack since it was unused and unneeded during current roleplay and replaced it with Stupid Luck Pack, yay me ( )
- With Charisma being not four points, the Advanced Mount Husbandry Pack is down-graded into simply Mount Husbandry Pack

Hallo once more! I have upgraded Allestane to his new form, all edits shall be in Blue. Thank ya to whomever.​

 

[fantuinn]

@Yui_Drax Approved.​

 

[Yui_Drax]

Proficiencies
- I forgot my old proficiencies but I assume I had a lot on combat and I lowered it to just two
- For Constitution, I increased it to five while adding support-esque abilities so I could tackle another aspect for this character both aesthetically and in-character
- For Magic I let it remain on one point and moved the three specials to the Abilities section
- For Charisma, I wanted to let my character to remain primarily a commander and added all I wanted from the packs offered

Abilities
- Added the aforementioned three specials from Spell Point Buy

Alrighty, I believe that is all I added / removed. Edits will be in Orange. Thanks for looking at this @fantuinn​

 

[WingedJade]

Approved.