Kiran Diakité Basic Information Full Name: Kiran Diakité | Age: 30 | Gender: Female | Race: Farah’deen Ailor (Norean Daen Ailor+ Songaskia) | Preferred Weapon: Fists Spoiler: Inventory Information [Inventory Information] 50 regals 3 pencils 2 small journals A key with red fabric tied around it Skill Information Points: 35 (30 Age + 5) || 29 Spent, 6 Free Core Proficiency Group Melee Combat Category +2 Fists Combat Science Skill Category +12 Linguistic Science Talent Proficiency Group Special Training Category +5 Bodycare Training [5 Talent Points] Hobby Proficiency Group Performance Art Category +10 Writing Art [5 hobby points, 5 Norean Boost] Culinary Art Category +8 Cooking Art [5 hobby points, 3 points] Ritualism {9 points} Ritualist Counter [Ability] + Dragon Mutationism [Aesthetic] Ritualist Light-Duel [Ability] + Ritualist Lightmeter [Aesthetic] To Develop IC [Ability] + Ritualist Familiar [Aesthetic] Arcanology {3 points} Affliction knowledge Body Shape Physical Stat: 5 Fist x 1, Bodycare x 0.5 2 Fist, 5 Bodycare 2 + (5 / 2) 2 + 2.5 = 4.5 Body Shape: Toned Body Fat: Moderate Languages Common (Free language) Sofaal (Parent language) Daendroquin (Linguistic Knowledge) Vashkularr (Linguistic Knowledge) Skodje (Linguistic Knowledge) Mythic Pack (Linguistic Knowledge) Spoiler: Mutations {Lavvanya Summons Mutations} Exist Purify | Skin is unnaturally smooth and perfect, and scars disappear Exist Carry | Smells of cinnamon buns and is incapable of bad odors Exist Light | Hair is a solid pearlescent white and cannot be dyed or stained Exist Bite | Nails and teeth are stark white and teeth are uncannily straight {Draconic Essence Mutations} Draconic Coronet | Can create Dravna coronet of crystal that glows faintly purple Draconic Shrine | Can create up to three intangible crystal bracelets or rings that can visually reflect a World Flow element or the Soul Rivers Draconic Disc | Can summon sun disc behind head that glows with the sun and disappears at night Visual Information Eye Color: Dark brown Hair Color: Pearlescent white {Dark Brown} Hair Style: low loose ponytail Skin Color: Light brown Clothing: skin-tight colorful clothing Height: 5’5 Personality & Abilities Core List Choose your character alignment. -True Neutral Choose your character personality type. -INFP-T | The Mediator Choose your character's religion. -Shambala 9/10 -Dragon worship 1/10 Life Story (1-12) Kiran Diakité was born into what would become a rapidly expanding family in June of 278 AC. Her father began to adopt children of various ages into the family almost as soon as she was born, and because of this, she was solidified as the middle child of the family despite being the “first born.” Her family has lived in the City of Regalia for as long as she can remember, and they often took trips to Farah'deen, where they often picked up more children that her father would adopt. Growing up in Regalia as the middle child of a very opinionated family. She quickly began to develop formative ideas about how the world works and how she needs to act within it. As a result, she began to settle, becoming the more quiet and complacent member of the family. Being quiet helped her gain a lot of free time. While her siblings spent that time getting into a considerable amount of trouble, she preferred to spend her time pursuing personal interests. She quickly picked up poetry and learning different languages, as she found it a good way to pass time and a funny way to slip in comments about her family's issues without them noticing. (13-18) As a teenager, her mother began to push some household responsibilities onto her, mainly cooking and providing for her family members when they got home. She would often cook as she listened to her family members' individual problems as they went about as they pleased. As they grew a little older, a new problem occurred: her Northorc sister began to get into more trouble, seemingly on some sort of pattern. This caused her father to create a family routine around it, encouraging the younger and weaker of the bunch (including herself) to quickly either learn how to hit or stay out of the Half-Orc's way when this occurred. During these times she began to feel discontent with most attributes of herself, causing her to switch between behavioral patterns and looks frequently. As she grew up primarily in Songaskian culture, she took inspiration from it and began to change accordingly over the next several years. (19-30) Eventually, finally putting a small foot into the community she’s always been inspired by, she found the group not as she imagined it to be. Quickly realizing how unrealistic her ideas were, she began to shut herself in, attempting to in some way, find herself.
@JoyMaker04 here we go: More of a side comment, but be sure the weapons in Kiran's inventory are concealed in public, since that would be something the city guard would arrest her for. This applies mostly for the handaxe over the daggers. You have 1 Proficiency point still available if you choose to invest in it. I would remove Altalar clothing unless its elaborated on in the life story. I don't see it as something she would've chosen to wear at random, even with her linguistic choices. Same idea with learning cultures. I'd throw some points into Society Knowledge (even if it doesn't unlock a pack, just to have that study time covered) or remove the cultural studying. Assuming her father is the Songaskian, why would he encourage the teaching of Faraddi? Is he a Farborn Songaskian and has less concern over dragon heritage? Or is there another reason? I'm not sure where she grew up, so I can't fully understand why she chose the languages she did. Add a location in the story for some geographical relevance, and also explain why she chose all these languages. At it stands, I feel Kiran hasn't invested enough into Society Knowledge to really dive into learning about her family's traditions. I think allocating some more points into that proficiency at the cost of a language would really help balance the character. Take what you can from my comments and see what you can do to. When you are finished with the edits, please tag me. If you need any assistance, let me know.
My mistake. I saw the science proficiency header and missed the next line. Good catch. @JoyMaker04 I've updated my review with this error fixed on my end. Let me know if you have any questions.
I'm content with these changes. Just remember that you will not be able to utilize a wide range of cultural knowledge due to the lack of packs, and this information is more background than anything. Approved. @JoyIsNecessary
@JoyIsNecessary sorry for the long wait. All I ask is that you provide me with a source for the Exist Lavvanya Mutations, since I do not see Lightgiver ritualism.
Apologies for the late action on this @JoyIsNecessary . In the future, use the blue tag for re-reviews so that it gets seen in a new channel. This all said, my review: Assuming Kiran is still a Dark Ailor, it would be impossible for them to have a Norean and Songaskian parent together, as Noreans can only reproduce with other Noreans. They would also not gain the Norean racial boosts for the same reason. besides that, everything checks out, so make that change somehow and tag me when complete. If you really need the Norean boost, I would say make their culture Hadrav'yan as a full blooded Ailor, while also considering the cultural norms of that unique mix culture.
