Basic Information Full Name: Eleanor D’lathail Age: 55 Gender: Female Race: Daendroque Central-Maritime Altalar Sexuality: N/A Preferred Weapon: Unarmed Skill InformationTotal Points: 70 Points Spent: 65 +8 Magical Knowledge Artifactism Dimenthism +4 Society Knowledge Unionist Culture +15 Conning Rogue +2 Stealth Rogue +15 Athletic Training +8 Unarmed Combat +1 Medical Sciences +12 Sorcery Combat Rolls Offensive Rolls Unarmed: 40/5 + 8/5 + 10 = 8 + 1.6 + 10 = 1d20 Base: 40/5 + 10 = 1d18 Defensive Unarmed: 15/3 + 8/5 + 10 = 5 + 1.6 + 10 = 1d17 Base: 15/3 + 10 = 1d15 Body Shape Phys. Stat: 40 [ Cap ] | 46 [ Uncapped ] Body Shape: Toned Body Fat: Average Languages Modern Altalar [ Fluent | Literate | Parents ] Middle Altalar [ Fluent | Literate | Parents ] Common [ Fluent | Literate | Free ] Special Traits/Spells/Mutations Racial Arcanomancy Memorymancy Powermancy Sorcery Lightness Healing Grace Hope’s Beacon Mage Empower: Burning Brightness Order Prevent Chaos Visual Information Eye Color: Green Hair Color: Black Hair Style: Waist Length Skin Color: Pale-ish Clothing: Daendroque-esque Mercantile Height: 6’4” Personality and Abilities The Core List Choose your Character Alignment True Neutral leaning Lawful Evil Choose your Character Personality Type The Entertainer Choose your Character's Religion Estel Allorn Branch - 1/10 Once believed to be gods, now nothing but tales of savages who could not comprehend what they saw, arken of the past or mage-lords, who can guess, but real nonetheless. Arkenism/Magic Worship etc. - 2/10 More so out of sheer fear than respect, she views the arken as living gods, the same applying to those born with the spark and have dedicated their lives to it, though not silven, viewing them as noteworthy but not special. Unionism - 1/10 She Recognizes the emperor as a living god, well as much of a living god as anybody else who possesses great power. Life Story Born at sea to a merchant and a sorcerer. Groomed to a business that’s less than sustainable by normal means and surrounded by things not of this world, and possible parental neglect, she quickly takes after her parents with a yearning for adventure. 19, Living fast and loose with the income that her family business provides, a bar on every isle they land is filled with gold and beer, though who leaves with most in the back room is not sure. A signature here, an initial there. 33, Settles down in Daenshore, still the life of the party. She starts working with a local daendroque plantation. Coincidentally the man's import seem to increase tenfold along with the influx of contraband in the area. Along with forging the hell out of everything, she helps with the morale among the work force considerably as well as helping the slaves not die of their wounds. 45, Starts studying the arcane, more degeneracy and immorality. She never did find a way to become a mage past selling her frankly worthless soul to an arken for that sweet sweet void flavored soul juice. 50, On the road again, joins up with her father mostly because he has a boat that doesn't charge. The complaining of the slaves really started to get on her nerves by this point and the ever present risk of getting murdered due to the envy of the slaves. 53, Lands in the holy city. 55, Works on trying to find her place.
Here is my review: Sorcery spells cost 4 proficiency points each, and you have already maxed out. You will have to remove a spell or adjust your points to accommodate. Your life story points are incredibly bare. Where did she study the arcane? Why? What did she do that paid for it? This life story really only says she moved from place to place, but lacks motive. Why stick with her parents if they neglected her? These little changes would greatly improve the storyline. Mark these edits in blue and tag me with @AlphaInsomnia when you are done.
8 for 2 lightness + 4 for 1 order = 12 or are mage empowers not free Expanded on the story a little. Most of what has happened to her is nepotism and poor impulse control. @AlphaInsomnia
+ 12 Magical Knowledge +4 Society Knowledge +15 Conning Rogue +2 Stealth Rogue +2 Burgling Rogue +15 Athletic Training +8 Unarmed Combat +12 Sorcery = 70. You only have a total of 60, assuming you're a half elf like the Race section leads readers to believe. It's a little confusing and I just could be mistaken.
Shifted point from burgling to medical sciences. Also removed arkenism and the related points because it doesn't exist anymore. @AlphaInsomnia
