}---+---{ ⏦Basic Info⏦ }---+---{ Full name: Phael Johnson Feberos Age: 279 AC July 28th, Summer (Twenty-eight) Gender: Transgender Male Race: Brood & Half-Cielothar/Half-Ailor(Daen) Sexuality: Heterosexual }[---+---]{ “The idea that I can't share my problems with other people makes me not give a shit about their problems.” - Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters “There's a point, around the age of twenty, when you have to choose whether to be like everybody else the rest of your life, or to make a virtue of your peculiarities.” - Ursula K. Le Guin, The Dispossessed }[---+---]{ }~---+---~{ ⏦Proficiencies⏦ }~---+---~{ 28 points 14+ Underworld Knowledge (from race boost and points) 15+ Literary Arts (from points) 4+ Body Care Training (from points) 2+ Food & Drinks Sciences (from points) 3+ Perception Training (from points) }~---+---~{ ⏦Body Proficiencies⏦ }~---+---~{ Splitting 15 in half equals 7.5 Body build: Toned Body fat: Low Body Fat }[---+---]{ “No passion is stronger in the breast of a man than the desire to make others believe as he believes. Nothing so cuts at the root of his happiness and fills him with rage as the sense that another rates low what he prizes high.” - Virginia Woolf, Orlando "Mother can beat me all she wants, but I haven’t let her take away my will to somehow survive." — Dave Pelzer (A Child Called "It" (Dave Pelzer, #1)) }[---+---]{ }---+---{ ⏦Language⏦ }---+---{ Common (learned during childhood) Daendroqin (taught by mother) Plains Elf (taught by father) }---+---{ ⏦Visual Information⏦ }---+---{ Eye colour: Crismon Skin colour: Olive Hair colour: Dark Brown Hair Style: Short & Shaved Clothing: He wears mostly vests, trousers & boots. Height: 5’7 ft }[---+---]{ “I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.” - Steve Martin “They say the seeds of what we will do are in all of us, but it always seemed to me that in those who make jokes in life the seeds are covered with better soil and with a higher grade of manure.” - Ernest Hemingway, A Moveable Feast }[---+---]{ }---+---{ ⏦Personality & Abilities⏦ }---+---{ Phael grimaces in fear, he will shy away, take steps back, and try to get as far away from what's scaring him as possible. Phael normally smokes and drinks stress away. Or piles more work onto himself, fun work. Like poetry, think up a dance routine, or sing a song under his breath. Though smoking is how he normally takes care of stress. When Phael becomes moderately happy he can not help but smile a bit. If he is extremely happy, he will be speechless, start to grin; maybe grab at his shirt or vest. Then he will start trying to form words, sentences and stumble on them in a poor attempt of trying to say something meaningful. Phael actually tries to study the law but finds some of it should change and not be changed. He agrees but disagrees. Authority? He will follow if it does not get him killed, but if you force him? He will leave or riot against you. His life has been filled with the “wrong” people forcing him to obey because what they said is “right” and he has fought for his will to think for himself before. Phael is really just desensitized to races, they all have their abilities and that is fine. He is not racist in any sense and fines it to just be the way things are. No race is superior nor is any race less, but Sanguines- if they even count. They make him stressed, maybe scared, sometimes, but he tolerates them and even lived with them. By force mind you, but he has found good or, at least understanding Sanguine. Phael would not go calling himself or someone else the savior of us all. He does not believe in religion and even finds it unnecessary, but he is taking a shine to the Old Gods. Magic and the Arcane, another huge part of his life was that around all sort of magic wielders and beings. Living in the underworld for so long leaves one to accept and come to terms with the wondrous things magic can do. He even wished as a child he could do magic, but that never came to be. Phael adores his family to bits, his wife and the children they have adopted. He came from a poor start, abusive family, and he will do anything to protect the family he has helped make. Tough there has been points when he let the way he was treated as a child affect him. Biggest insecurity is between the pesky question, is he truly male, and is he enough for his family? Can he keep them safe? What if he can not and it will be all his fault? That must be his biggest insecurity.. and, it is. Phael is proud of how he has handled life in some aspects. How he never could let himself succumb to those around him or die. He is proud he is a survivor and a fighter when he needed to be. Motivates? Really, himself in his early years and the will to not die. Lately? His wife and children, the coven he calls his job and a little fourteen-year-old named Adelaide in some aspects, but mostly his family. The other options mentioned only do so much, but his wife and children mean the world to him. Phael's biggest fear is dying. As cliche as it is, it's true. He has so much to do and it feels like so little time. Phael has a family, friends, a job and a role in his coven. What will happen if he disappears finally? }---------------{ “Natures of your kind, with strong, delicate senses, the soul-oriented, the dreamers, poets, lovers are always superior to us creatures of the mind. You take your being from your mothers. You live fully; you were endowed with the strength of love, the ability to feel. Whereas we creatures of reason, we don't live fully; we live in an arid land, even though we often seem to guide and rule you. Yours is the plentitude of life, the sap of the fruit, the garden of passion, the beautiful landscape of art. Your home is the earth; ours is the world of ideas. You are in danger of drowning in the world of the senses; ours is the danger of suffocating in an airless void. You are an artist; I am a thinker. You sleep at your mother's breast; I wake in the desert. For me the sun shines; for you the moon and the stars. ” - Hermann Hesse }---------------{ }---+---{ ⏦Life Story⏦ }---+---{ 279 AC Phael was born as a female. His mother was Zanetta (Daen, Sanguine) and Calvin (Cielothar), his father. Phael was born in the infamous City of Daenshore. 282 AC The family moved to Arvost where Phael’s childhood was located. 284 AC - 290 AC Zanetta started to abuse Phael and his father, emotionally at first, but then she felt physical punishment was needed. His mother also wanted him to learn to dance and write. 290 AC He was only eleven. Phael watched his house burn to the ground from a distance; a strange figure of bones and flesh leave the flames. The house was searched, and Phael was free from his parents. 290 AC - 298 AC Phael was sucked into the local underworld and felt at home. There he made a living out of giving body care treatments, dancing and supplying from time to time when he became older. 298 AC Phael traveled on a boat to Regalia. 299 AC Phael made it to the city and instantly was drawn to Old Town. He made quick connections and “friends” there. 300 AC - 301 AC A lot of unspeakable things happened in a short span of a year. Phael was forced into slavery, tortured, and was imprisoned by his enslavers. He also had a shaky relationship with two lovers. They both saw him as an object. It was not until by the end of the year he escaped from his captors and decided to become male. 302 AC Phael came an across a girl and after months of seeing each other, they became a couple. The lovers would also adopt a son, Caspian. 303 AC Phael and his lover faced discrimination and punishment by the Inquisitors which forced them to hide. They would also marry each other illegally the same night. Later in the year, they were faced with even more discrimination which forced them to leave Regalia to the Elf Plains. 304 AC - 306 AC The lovers would acquire more children through adoption or other means and live peacefully until Phael’s wife almost dies giving birth. She murders a mage and Phael tries to cover up the murder, but at the end of it, they’re forced back to Regalia. 307 AC Phael rejoins with his coven doing what he can and keeping his family safe.
Alright, sup! I’m probably going to change his body build realll quick if that’s okay- I was just informed you can get muscle from Literary points.
Review! 1) Your fear paragraph is very confusing on addressing fear as a concept. Remove specific examples and explain what happens in the face of fear it's self, and make sure to focus on what happens during fear, not that they're used to/adjusted to fear. 2) Same goes for your stress section. Focus on what he does when faced with stress, not why or specific examples. 3) Label the greatest fear and not just alluded it happened once. Even then label what greatest fear can effect them /now/, if the prior 'greatest fear' doesnt effect them as it used to, not that it happened or such. 4) Heavily expand your life story. All details of the char trying to be presented are lost due to the life story being only 6 short sentences. Correct this. Tag me @Havsbris_ And mark your changes in Blue @Weird3y_
I ask you finish making your changes to this app within a week, or this app will be rejected. @Weird3y_
Review! 1) Your fear section is incredibly confusing and seems to simply beat around the bush of actually reacting to fear and remains a mary-sue. Change this. Do not write as addressing 'you' and address more the character does xyz. Tag me @Havsbris_ and mark your changes in Red. @Weird3y_
