Played Character Aldon Adeliason

Discussion in 'Character Sheets' started by Lizehrd, Aug 26, 2021.

  1. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Character Information
    Name: Aldon Adeliason

    Age: 23
    Birthday: 30th of January, 288 AC
    Birthplace: City of Regalia, Crown Isles (Supposedly)

    Gender: Masculine
    Pronouns: He/Him/His

    Race: Asha

    Sexuality: Homosexual

    Eye Color: Heterochromatic (Gray and Cyan)
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Core Concept
    Religion
    Disenfranchised with Unionism as a result of the recent slavery of the Asha and the treatment he received as a result of being a Brood, Aldon has since turned to Estellon as his faith, less because of the ideals and history it is built upon and more because of the covenant that has come to accept him.

    Identity
    One of the many forgotten and impoverished people of Regalia, Aldon is a vagrant, dreamer, and builder, hoping to uplift the overlooked peoples of Regalia in an almost-Jacobin way. Less obsessed with the ideas of perfection as much as he ambitiously seeks the idea of having better, Aldon believes in a Regalia where Crookback and the “undercity” live free from oppression.
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Proficiency Information
    Strength: 5
    • Melee Point Buy: Duelist Pack, Frenzy Pack
    • Bruiser Point Buy: Bruiser Feint Pack, Bruiser Slam Pack, Bruiser Tackle Pack

    Constitution: 4
    • Defensive Point Buy: Turtle Pack, Counterplay Pack, Ironheart Pack
    • Training Point Buy: Resilience Pack

    Wisdom: 1
    • Artificer Point Buy: Medical Pack
      • Technology Branch: Living Metal
      • Artificer Specials: Medical Patent, Hacking Patent

    Dexterity: 2
    • Roguery Point Buy: Parkour Pack, Balance Pack

    Magic: 0

    Charisma: 2
    • State Point Buy: Saboteur Pack, Agitator Pack

    Faith: 0
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Ability Information
    Non-Racial Kits

    • Strangle Marken

    Languages
    • Common (Free)
    • Saan (Regional)
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Appearance Information
    Mutations

    Aldon does not have any mutations (for now).

    Appearance
    Despite his name, Aldon does not appear at all like an Ailor, instead being a white-furred, hybrid Asha with predominantly husky-like traits, the only major outlier being his lion-like mane of fur, feline grace, and his saber-like incisors.

    Shifts
    N/A
    ༺═──────────────═༻
    Life Story
    Plot Hooks

    • WIP
    ༺═──────────────═༻
     
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    #1 Lizehrd, Aug 26, 2021
    Last edited: Jun 4, 2023
  2. Follower

    Follower :3c

    Joined:
    May 17, 2019
    Messages:
    881
    Likes Received:
    128
    @Lizehrd Hello, I'll be claiming this app for review, expect a reply within 36 hours.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  3. Follower

    Follower :3c

    Joined:
    May 17, 2019
    Messages:
    881
    Likes Received:
    128
    @Lizehrd Everything seems to be in order, Approved.
    Just please swap the phrasing from 'Talent Points' to 'Hobby Points' for your proficiencies.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  4. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Updated sheet to reflect Aldon training his Unarmed and Singing skills IC, and to note the Gift of the Colossi!
     
    #4 Lizehrd, Sep 13, 2021
    Last edited: Sep 13, 2021
  5. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Updated Aldon’s sheet to include Arken proficiency (since recognizing Broods is tied to that knowledge, and he’s had a good amount of experience now with some Arken). Removed Writing Proficiency (because it didn’t really apply to him), and updated his language in accordance with the Linguistics update. Set for Re-Review!
     
    #5 Lizehrd, Oct 13, 2021
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2021
  6. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    Claimed for review. Expect a response shortly.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  7. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  8. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @sonofthestars Very small change this time: I realized there was some aging discontinuity with Aldon and decided to age him down four years, since I kinda forgot how long schooling actually was.
     
  9. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  10. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @sonofthestars Updated Aldon’s sheet according to the new proficiency update. Didn’t change any proficiencies save for the ones that got removed, but the prefix disappeared anyways, hence why it needs re-reviewed.
     
  11. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  12. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Updated to account for the Ailor Racial changes!
     
  13. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    @Lizehrd Approved. Please remember to mark this app as 'Needs Re-Review' next time you update it.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  14. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @sonofthestars Very small update this time: Changed one of Aldon’s sorceries to Vile Vine 1. Hopefully everything’s all good!
     
  15. sonofthestars

    sonofthestars chaotic stupid

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    1,273
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  16. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
  17. Acosmism

    Acosmism Sugar Parental Unit

    Joined:
    May 25, 2020
    Messages:
    1,032
    Likes Received:
    144
    You've used 15 points, not 14. Remove one and you'll be good to go.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  18. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    The 8 in Strength is from the Ailor Special, which if I remember correctly allows them to put the extra point in a single Stat they have 7 points in already.
     
  19. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Nvm I’m wrong let me change that
     
  20. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Pardon my foolishness, I fixed it! Should be all good now.
     
  21. Acosmism

    Acosmism Sugar Parental Unit

    Joined:
    May 25, 2020
    Messages:
    1,032
    Likes Received:
    144
    You’re good! Approved.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  22. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Acosmism Updated for Direct Conception Silvenism, and swapped out one of Aldon’s Cahalic packs from Space Magic to Sensor Magic.
     
    #22 Lizehrd, May 16, 2022
    Last edited: May 16, 2022
  23. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Bump for @Acosmism because I messed up the pinging the first time (my bad!)
     
  24. Volaie

    Volaie Honest Citizen

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2021
    Messages:
    656
    Likes Received:
    208
    Approved.
     
  25. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Volaie Updated Aldon! Shifted around his stats a bit, reduced his Strength and gave him some more funky abilities to use for RP and Progressions. Hopefully all seems good!
     
  26. Messtro

    Messtro Flower Goblin

    Joined:
    May 23, 2016
    Messages:
    1,921
    Likes Received:
    801
    approved.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  27. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Cleaning up Aldon’s page a bit and getting him updated and such. Changed around his proficiencies a bit to better match both some updates to him and to some lore things, might change some stuff around again.
     
  28. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    Approved.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  29. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Caelamus Hey! So Aldon got a complete retcon/rewrite that isn’t really a complete retcon/rewrite but is kinda one. Spirit of the character remains, but many of the details have been greatly changed. Hopefully everything is alright.
     
  30. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    Approved. Although I don't think I am going to approve any further edits without an argumentation for why. You'll probably be happy with them as an Asha, I agree the change is good and you'll have more fun with them that way but you should try to settle on everything else and try to get comfortable with them as they are now. Stick to Aldon for awhile as they are and see where it goes.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  31. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Understood, thank you. I don’t have any intention to really edit anything else about Aldon right now, since my only worry was in the continuity of his backstory. I’ll be more clear on my argumentation for any edits I do make in the future.
     
  32. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Caelamus I have updated Aldon according to the new Magic revamp. I’ve only given him three out of potentially nine specials for now, just keeping the core ones that are really important for him IRP.

    I have also shifted Aldon’s Constitution and Wisdom a bit, since I never used his Exist Avatar from Soulrend and Aldon’s combat profile has always had a focus on “outlasting” his opponent and taking them down with him. I felt like it was a waste that he didn’t have both Ironheart and Counterplay, so I updated his sheet with that. Hopefully all is in order.
     
  33. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    Approved.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  34. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Caelamus Hi! I’ve kinda rehashed Aldon entirely (again).

    To keep it short, Aldon was stuck between “violent protector mindless beast Cahal” and “anti-state quirky freedom fighter,” which he really wasn’t either anymore. I wanted to actually make him somebody that people could genuinely identify as a Change Silven whilst also making him somebody that feels like an Asha. So I scrapped him being a fistfighter (for the most part, since big mech and Asha class still exist), replaced his magic with magitech, and also just took a look at his personality. Kinda changed everything about him while also keeping him recognizably him, and hopefully that’s okay.

    I also finally specified what he’s a hybrid between, that too. He’s mostly a dog with part sabercat.
     
  35. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    I'm of the opinion that if you really want to stand out as a Silven more then you are going to need to choose between being a Silven and having that be the core aspect of his identity or being a Cahal. You play the character as if you want them to be a relevant silven in the eyes of others but also kind of keep tacking on peripheral things like Cahalism that dilute that identity. Whenever I personally think of the character I only ever see that iteration of Aldon that was a Cahal Brood who manned a bar and did a lot of Cahal things. That was Aldon at their peak to me, it's difficult to determine what or who the character is these days because of all the changes you have imposed over time and hard pivoting out of what made the character so popular in the day to begin with. Also the thing about Change is that it's one thing to talk about a character's motives, ideas and desire to impose change and acting upon it to see it through. I don't interact that much with the Exist crowd these days and it's still more apparent to me on the outside that Aldon is a Cahal but I have to go on your application to see the visibility of them being a change silven and that to a degree says something about the character.

    A good tl;dr of that is you need to pick an identity and stick with it and be more proactive in what you're doing than talking about what you're doing in OOC channels like the Cahal discord.

    If you really want to hard pursue Silven and going that route, you are going to need to consider dropping those peripheral things. Especially Cahalism because higher entities don't really regard afflictions like vampirism/cahalism very highly, they are basically cannon fodder.

    Ultimately though, I'm not gonna stop you if you want to continue the status quo of the character. Everything is fine with him. But if you want to pursue higher relevance with Aldon, you are going to have to make some decisions. My personal opinion would be to stop hard pivoting and go back to what made the character relevant (in my eyes) to begin with.
     
  36. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Caelamus
    That’s what I’m finally trying to do here, is to decide between being a Silven and being a Cahal, because for too long I’ve tried to straddle the line. I took a while to sit down and think on where Aldon was at and which part of him to ultimately remove. I know his initial concept was as a Cahal, but playing him as being more of a Silven has been, personally, a lot more satisfying for me. I don’t think I wish for Aldon to be a violent, zealous cultist, because the parts of Cahalism that he initial focused on was an aspect of the Cahalic identity that was removed: being a werewolf that’s hidden in plain sight. That’s not really part of the Cahalic identity anymore as much as it was, and so it’d be really hard for me to go back to that, I feel.

    With every update I have been on the trend of removing more and more of that part of Aldon without really thinking about it. I think there has been a natural trend towards Aldon becoming more Silven and less Cahal, since I don’t know if I want to try and re-capture that old identity of “werewolf hunter fighting for a homeland that doesn’t wholly accept him.” I think I can hold onto the idea of Aldon fighting for Regalia in his own way, and that’s what each update has been drawing him towards.

    Ultimately, I think what I want Aldon to be is this: a “child of the Exist” who is also a “child of Regalia,” trying to help Regalia grow towards his view of paradise. That was Aldon’s original concept, and the naivety of that is what I want to return to. I want him to be a naive, stubborn, scrappy, out-of-place dreamer, and I don’t think that really fits with him being a full-on Cahal. I think that fits with him being a Cahalic Brood and I think that fits with him being a Silven, but not a true Cahal as they are now. In essence, I want to have Aldon return to how he acted when he was still “Aldon the Brood,” and I think that involves him being less a true Cahal, if that makes sense.

    So, this is my attempt at saying, “I’m not just going to have Aldon be caught in an identity crisis between an identity that isn’t valid anymore due to the changes in lore, and an identity that I haven’t held to at all.” I’m going to have him start doing, and try to bring him back to his roots when he was a Brood: protective, naive, a dreamer, and something of, potentially, a big brother to other characters that he connects with. I think this is the best way I can do that, whilst also acknowledging that he’s an Asha and not an Ailor anymore.

    So, yes, this is a hard pivot, but I also think this is a hard pivot back to who Aldon was originally when him being a Brood was the major point of his identity, and it’s my hope to return him back to those vibes.
     
  37. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    You can still do this. Even more so now actually. We need more werewolf Cahal.

    Although after reading through your response. I think another issue is highlighted in that you think way too much about these things, talk too much about these things when you should just be doing. This may sound harsh, but I want to clarify I'm only offering you this criticism as your reviewer and I do genuinely want to see you improve and do things with the character and have fun. But I think the energy you spend thinking about the character and their motives, their design and where to go, would be much better spent doing something with them instead. A Change Silven should be radiating strong top energy. You should go out and do things with them. I should be going into this review knowing who, what and exactly what Aldon is, it shouldn't be much of a debate. The actions of a character speak a lot more than what you tell me on paper, and I haven't heard a lot about the character and that fact itself is of immediate detriment to the identity of what they should be doing and you don't have to necessarily be active to do that. I'm going to use Drulailmon as an example here because Bahm only ever gets like two or three days a week to do things and his character is incredibly notable in the wider community for various reasons. He goes out and does things and has strong character identity. There's a lot of factors at play but it's a good example. When Drulailmon is mentioned, you think Cahal. That same logic should be applicable to Aldon because Silvenism is meant to be a foundational aspect of the character.

    You need to stop hard pivoting and changing this character and settle upon a design and start acting on it. Like us sitting here talking about is great and all but the energy spent here can be better spent doing things. Like if the character was still a Cahal/Brood you could just log on right now, turn into a werewolf and start attacking people in the street and become the talk of the town for the day rather than sitting here thinking about xyz thing and where you wanna go or what you wanna do.

    Go stab people dude. Go encourage change. Actions speak a lot louder than words. Talking to someone about change isn't going to make them change.
     
  38. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    Aldon does need a bit of a rework/update, and I think that him being a Cahal might have been part of the issue of why he needed to be sorta rehashed and looked at again. Maybe I’m wrong and it was the Cahalic part of him and the conflict derived specifically from that was overall positive, but my worry is that it wasn’t.

    I do have intentions to go out and encourage change and provoke conflict through that, but I don’t want to do so in a way that isn’t fun for others, and I don’t think the way I’ve played Aldon as a Cahal-influenced individual attacking others has been fun for said others. But I don’t want to just keep thinking and rethinking things. I want to go out and just do, and I’m trying to find the best way to do that whilst also not playing a character that is unpleasant for others to experience.

    With that said, I suppose I could just change Aldon’s magic to tech, clarify his personality, and then move forward with that and just start doing.
     
    #38 Lizehrd, Oct 4, 2022
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2022
  39. Caelamus

    Caelamus Sir Honeybear the chronic druid main

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2013
    Messages:
    6,149
    Likes Received:
    381
    Approved.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  40. Lizehrd

    Lizehrd Lizard and Chill

    Joined:
    May 31, 2018
    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    4
    @Caelamus
    I took some time to think, and I guess I don’t think I can really envision a version of Aldon that isn’t, in some way, a Cahal. I think I need to actually try and learn the balance of playing a werewolf-creature and playing the person on the other side, and challenge myself to keep them separate, as was the original identity divide of OG Aldon. So, I made another revision. Not a rehash, but a revision. And, pending IC interaction, I’m going to make him a Cahal again. I think you’re right, and I needed to sit down and see that. My apologies for changing the sheet again so soon.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice