The Undercity Bulletin | Issue #1

Discussion in 'Regalian Roleplay' started by Ocularum, Apr 20, 2021.

  1. Ocularum

    Ocularum Scott Staff Member PR3

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    [​IMG][​IMG]

    THE “PLAYERO” PROBLEM
    You know, I’d originally written this and stashed it away. I didn’t want to contribute to the rubbish most people consider their prime source of information, but I thought it worth posting now because boy oh boy is it more relevant than ever.

    The Playeros, a Daendroque family playing at being the criminal ring they could only hope to be back in their native province, are continually caught and constantly besmirched by the Undercity and goody-two-shoes alike. How long will their continued presence be allowed, and how long will their useless apologies and theatrics remain tacked up on notice boards as nothing more than wasted space?

    The same goes for every bloody pamphlet that makes its way to the notice boards only to be scribbled and scrawled on by twenty hundred toddlers who think they’ve got just the thing to say, because this isn’t a problem with just the Playeros, it’s a problem with the barely literate sewer dwelling peoples with no clue when to shut their mouths. If you have a problem with that you can come find me, but I doubt you have the mental faculty to read words as big as these.

    Nobody gives a rat’s ass about how big and tough you are when all you do is spend your time hemming and hawing your thoughts out like you’re giving the world’s slowest sermon. I don’t want to see a single response to this fucking bulletin. Read the rest of the shit I have to say before you dedicate ten minutes of your time to some poorly written rebuttal to a point you’ll prove by responding.

    And if you really want to think about saying something? Go outside for once. Maybe pick up the letters your father would’ve taught you if he hadn’t left your mother wanting and alone.

    YOU DESERVE BETTER
    by the Demagogue penned April 4th, 309

    To the common people of Regalia, particularly those of Old Town and Crookback, and any who might heed my words,

    You deserve better.

    Within the Regalian city, untold hundreds of thousands lead destitute, hopeless lives in abject squalor, while a small upper crust of elitists maintain the largest mass of wealth and power ever accumulated since the last great civilization. You, the common people, are relegated to a so-determined lesser portion of the city. Walls are erected around your homes, rising above your chimneys like great mountains, treating you all as criminals. Your streets are left largely unpaved, overgrown with foliage and overrun with raw sewage.

    You deserve better.

    Your opportunities to earn a meager living for yourselves and your families are scarce, and all too often insufficient. Have you ever gone hungry so that one you love could eat? Many in this city have, and do. What work you might be capable of finding is dehumanizing, the most back-breaking, dangerous, and demeaning forms of labor, and reward but the smallest penance in return. Yet the elites in the city, living without want, earn more money than they know how to spend whilst barely lifting but a finger. Their food overflows to the point of ample waste, while those they define as ‘less than’ are forced to beg at an Almshouse so that they might not starve.

    You deserve better.

    A single member of these elites occupies as much living space as a dozen of the common people, a living space wherein each room is arrayed in more wealth and opulence than many of us shall ever possess in a lifetime. You are forced, by the policies of these elites, to subject yourselves to near constant crime and danger, where neither yourself nor your properties are secure. They isolate you to a corner of the city, where the houses are rundown and have long outlived their builders. Meanwhile, these elites enjoy the protection of dozens upon dozens of heavily armed and militarized brutes, prepared to execute the will of the elites upon those of us who are ‘less than.’

    You deserve better.

    You are treated as sub-human, merely for the position of your birth. They trample upon you. They denigrate you for things beyond your control, things largely of the elites’ making. They beat you, they abuse you, they torture you, and they mutilate you on whims merely because you harm their ego. Juane Ineneh, a Songaski medic who worked with the Violet Order, was executed after a brief show trial. Her only ‘crime’ was daring to utter the wrong words, words critical against the absolutism of the elitist hierarchy. You are all aware of the recent imperial decree regarding mistitling these elites. For use of the wrong words, you will be killed.

    You deserve better.

    The elites in this city, the ‘better bred,’ the ‘noble’ people, are nothing but profiteers off of the misery and suffering of all of you. They desire to keep you under their control, so that they might steal from you your possessions, your health, your youth, your life. They keep you poor, and weak, so that they might keep you under control, and keep you under control they do. At any point when any such individual or group might dare to question this wretched status quo, they are hunted, and they are murdered. No more, I say. We deserve better.

    And we shall have better.

    ON THE CROOKBACK COUNCIL AND RECENT BURNING
    I’m not going to lie. The whole situation tickled me a little because who cares, with full offense to the militia, about some rinky dink office on the shit side of town? If anything it’s an opportunity to renovate, even if this Tony guy didn’t get the change he was looking for. Politicians, even slumdog ones, don’t really represent the people they govern. That’s not a new, novel concept. It’s a fact, and I think we’ve also established that setting things on fire is a great way to get yourself stuffed in a cage for the rest of your life.


    Or, the rest of your not life if I can be entirely honest. At least Tony has the Amayas to take up for him and wow it really is convenient that they keep coming up, right? Aren’t we all sick of that? Do these folks pay taxes or what?


    GENERAL NOTICES
    The weekly sanguine lecture is taking place yet again this week, and every week thereafter at the exact same time it always is.

    If you’ve borrowed a book from Xilthruum’s library be sure to return it before you meet your untimely end. We heard a little rumor that he died, so maybe that’s less likely these days.

    Congratulations to the Werebeasts of New Crookback for finally winning their first fight hosted by The Square Go. This is an advertisement.

    [​IMG]

    OOC
    The Undercity Bulletin is meant to be a brief addition to the main paper. I plan to release it significantly less often than the Scratch’s current monthly schedule, so consider this a test run of the format and tone. Please leave feedback. Ratings do not sustain my content.

    Additional Reading
    Rally For A New Council

    And thanks to...
    Anonymous contributors for this issue.
     
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  2. Legoclub22

    Legoclub22 The Antagonist's Right-Hand

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    bwmwags3 Refugee

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  4. dimetros

    dimetros unironic scalie

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  5. FirelightMLPOC

    FirelightMLPOC

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    GRIST_ The Antagonist Premium

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