Leon Griffin

Discussion in 'Character Sheets' started by Alikiforever, Mar 26, 2021.

  1. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I'm gonna have to edit Leon because of the half race update
     
  2. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    so sorry i know i update this to much TwT but ya for the half races update
     
  3. Antimreoir

    Antimreoir Refugee

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  4. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Ok so im revamping leon entirely now that im back not a lot is gonna change besides her parentage but ya could you re review it?
     
  5. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    i feel like i wrote it weird TwT
     
  6. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    Claimed for review
     
    • Like Like x 1
  7. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    First off, this will need to be changed to 18. Server rules are that all characters must be 18 years old and up.

    You have 1 point left over. Invest it if you'd like or just mark it as extra.

    Please mark these changes in red and tag me when finished.
     
  8. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Ah shit sorry I forgot to take of the 17 and leave it 18 the charecter is 18 as of last June thanks for pointing that out I’ll fix it in a jiffy
     
  9. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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  10. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    I made a mistake. Return this to a 3 and youll have 50 points, sorry for my poor math skills. Approved.
     
  11. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    A shit I forgot to take out dance TwT so sorry @festiveCorvid could you aprove of this it’s my mistake I apoligize
     
  12. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I just hope I got the math right I used a calculator
     
  13. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    You still have Dance points invested, take those out and you'll be fine.
     
  14. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Heads up my char might be turned into a crimson witch soon Becuase of in rp reasons
     
  15. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    and it happned i dont know if i avoided mistakes but i hope i did @festiveCorvid
     
  16. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    Reapproved.
     
  17. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I keep forgetting to transfer over some information see I do all the editing in the doc and transfer it over but then I forget that I made changes and just...i feel so bad for making so many mistakes so sorry
     
  18. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I just put the wrong numbers in for the proficiency I took five sailing art away and distributed it through sword combat, instrument art, and fist combat
     
  19. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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  20. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    FYI I copy and pasted the doc in so this time there should be no mistakes
     
  21. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    @Alikiforever You have 2 points leftover to spend. You may assign them as you please. Approved.
     
  22. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    @festiveCorvid becuase of ticketed reasons I have to revamp the charecter again (TwT) it took some time but I’ve used my calculator and everything should be fine so I just need a repaproval
     
  23. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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    Youve used 60 points here, not fifty. You already have 30 points in regular proficiencies, then 30 in sorcery and engineering. Please fix this.
     
  24. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Yes I used 60 50 in regular ten in hobby i thought I did the math right?
     
  25. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Alright I’ll do the math again and change it
     
  26. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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  27. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    Hey @festiveCorvid so I have an even today at 5 pm that I need to be on time for (It’s the Pet talent show) TwT I don’t wanna hurry you but I’m gonna have to go in approved or not
     
  28. festiveCorvid

    festiveCorvid Product of German Engineering Premium

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  29. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    A crap I forgot to change the age to 36 (it's like the smallest detail she still looks young tho so it's not that important) @festiveCorvid
     
  30. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I did an entire rehaul so imma just get it reviewd
     
  31. Scribbe

    Scribbe Scribma Male Staff Member Lore1

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    Scooping this one up. Expect a review soon.
     
  32. Scribbe

    Scribbe Scribma Male Staff Member Lore1

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    You can only take one native language + Common as an Altalar. Taking a look over your backstory, it seems like the native language should be d'Ithanie since Leon spent the first part of her life in an Ithanian orphanage, not Daendroque and definitely not Katharic.
    Does the red eye come from any kind of affliction or mutation? The Eye Color entry is there to denote any visual afflictions-- things like Geists, Archons, Vampires, and Cahal. If not, then the heterochromia should be green/blue and not red/blue.

    Mark your edits in red and @tag me when you're done. Happy editing!
     
  33. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    she grew up in deandroq @Scribbe with a katharic parent and she has an eye mutati0n but hey ill change it to orange and cyan blue i think? (i reskined it and dont know what kind of blue i used but hey its dark and looks nice)
     
  34. Scribbe

    Scribbe Scribma Male Staff Member Lore1

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    You can still only have one native language. Also, it isn't mentioned anywhere in the life story that Leon has a Kathar parent, and your child only speaking Kathar in a place where everyone speaks Daendroque isn't going to be very helpful for them at all. Please pick only one.

    @Alikiforever
     
  35. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    It doesn’t mention it cuz it was cut out because if I put Leon’s whole life story in there it gets long and hard to keep track of so my reviewer asked me to keep it short since I passed the point of no return with the details (I just keep details in my doc now)
     
  36. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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    I put in the pack and did all necessary edits now @Scribbe
     
  37. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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  38. Scribbe

    Scribbe Scribma Male Staff Member Lore1

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    So sorry, I completely forgot to get onto this. It all looks fine now, approved.
     
  39. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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  40. Alikiforever

    Alikiforever Aliki

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